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2020/12/08 05:45:49瀏覽365|回應0|推薦6 | |
【書摘】女逃亡者—阿爾貝蒂娜的出走 (Albertines departure) 6 Je pensais tout le temps à Albertine, et jamais Françoise en entrant dans ma chambre ne me disait assez vite.: « Il n’y a pas de lettres », pour abréger l’angoisse. Mais de temps en temps je parvenais, en faisant passer tel ou tel courant d’idées au travers de mon chagrin, à renouveler, à aérer un peu l’atmosphère viciée de mon coeuri; mais le soir, si je parvenais à m’endormir, alors c’était comme si le souvenir d’Albertine avait été le médicament qui m’avait procuré le sommeil, et dont l’influence, en cessant m’éveillerait. Je pensais tout le temps à Albertine en dormant. C’était un sommeil spécial à elle, qu’elle me donnait et où, du reste, je n’aurais plus été libre comme pendant la veille de penser à autre chose. Le sommeil, son souvenir, c’étaient les deux substances mêlées qu’on nous fait prendre à la fois pour dormir. (l’édition Gallimard, Paris, 1946-47) 我時時刻刻都在想念阿爾貝蒂娜,弗朗索瓦絲走進我房間時卻從不迅速地對我說「沒有信」以便縮短我的焦慮,不過我仍舊不時地硬把某些思緒插進我的憂傷之情裡從而使我心田裡的污濁空氣得以稍事流通和更新。然而到晚上,我好不容易睡著了,似乎又是對阿爾貝蒂娜的回憶像藥劑一樣使我睡著的,藥效一停我興許就會醒過來。我在睡夢裡也沒有一刻不思念阿爾貝蒂娜。她給我的睡眠是很特別的,而且在這樣的睡眠裡我根本不可能像白天一樣隨意去想別的事。睡眠和對睡眠的回憶是兩種互相交織的事物,要想睡著就得同時求助於它們倆。 (p.31 追憶似水年華 VI 女逃亡者 聯經版 1992) I thought of Albertine all the time and never was Françoise, when she came into my room, quick enough in saying: “There are no letters,” to curtail my anguish. From time to time I succeeded, by letting some current or other of ideas flow through my grief, in refreshing, in aerating to some slight extent the vitiated atmosphere of my heart, but at night, if I succeeded in going to sleep, then it was as though the memory of Albertine had been the drug that had procured my sleep, whereas the cessation of its influence would awaken me. I thought all the time of Albertine while I was asleep. It was a special sleep of her own that she gave me, and one in which, moreover, I should no longer have been at liberty, as when awake, to think of other things. Sleep and the memory of her were the two substances which I must mix together and take at one draught in order to put myself to sleep. (Translated by C. K. Scott Moncrieff) I thought constantly of Albertine, and when Françoise entered my room she could never say, There are no letters soon enough to cut short my anxiety. But from time to time, by letting some current of ideas or other flow through my sorrow, I managed to refresh and ventilate a little the stuffy atmosphere of my heart. But then in the evening, if I managed to get off to sleep, it was as if the memory of Albertine had been the medicine which had induced my sleep, which as its effects wore off, would waken me. I thought of Albertine all the time that I was asleep. It was a very special sleep, which only she could provide me with and, what is more, one where I would not have been free, as I might during my waking hours, to think of anything else. Sleep and her memory were like two substances mingled together to form a sleeping-draught. (Translated by Peter Collier) |
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( 知識學習|隨堂筆記 ) |