5、

一公司在小便池上貼上條：

往前一小步，文明一大步，

結果地上仍有許多尿漬。

後來公司認真吸取教訓，

重新設計成：

尿不到池裡說明你短；

尿到池外說明你軟，

結果地上比以前乾淨許多。

此事的重要啟示：

“給客戶的投資建議一定要具體，

確切並擊中要害。”

A company labels on each urinal with a poster, saying "a small step forward, a big leap to civilization.", but there are still dirty marks left on the floor.  Then the company take the lessons seriously and revise the wordings to "If you are unable to reach into urinal, you are short; if you drop your urine onto the floor, you are soft."  As a result, the floor has been much cleaner since.

Revelations:

Give your customers a substantial investment proposal, which should always be a precise and crucial one.  

6、

某日，女祕書神色凝重地說：

王總，我懷孕了。

王繼續低頭看文件，

然後淡淡一笑說：我早結紮了。

女祕書愣了一會媚笑道：我和您開玩笑呢!

王抬起頭看了她一眼，

喝了口茶，說:我也是。

此事的重要啟示：

“在江湖上混的人，遇事不要慌，要先讓子彈飛一會。”

With sullen and serious look, a secretary one day said to her boss, "Mr. Wang, I am pregnant."  Wang continued reading documents and then smiled lightly, "I had male ligation already."  At a loss for a second, the secretary said with a flirtatious smile, "I am just kidding."  Raising his head, taking a sip of tea, replied Wang, "So am I." 

Revelations: In the sophisticated society, one should always address problems with aplomb.  Just let the bullet fly a little bit longer.   

7、

三位男子去提親，

女方家長：請自我介紹。

A說：我有一千萬。

B說：我有一棟豪宅，價值兩千萬。

家長很滿意。

就問C，你家有什麼？

C答：我什麼都沒有，

只有一個孩子，

在你女兒肚子裡。

AB無語，走了。

此事的重要啟示：

“核心競爭力不是錢和房子，

是在關鍵的崗位有自已的人。”

Three gentlemen are vying with one another for a marriage proposal.  The father of the girl let each one of them introduce himself first.  Gentleman A boasts he has ten million dollars, and B boasts he has a luxurious house that is worth twenty million.  The father seems satisfied and asks C what has he had.  C replies to the question that he has a baby only, which is in the womb of your daughter.  A and B then leave without a word.

Revelations: The core power in competition does not hinge upon the money and the houses you have; it hinges upon the key person of yours in a right place.     

8、

一老闆玩小三玩膩，

而小三漸漸大齡，

逼婚不成要索千萬賠償。

老闆原想:滅口，

後財務總監獻計：

以提高文化水平為由，由老闆出資十萬元，

讓小三上了EMBA班。

班上老闆如雲，小三一下迷倒了全班男生。

沒兩個月，小三就不理老闆了，

還給了老闆一百萬封口費。

案例啟示：

“企業處置不良資產最有效的方式是包裝轉讓，而非丟棄和自己消化。”

A boss has been tired of his mistress who is not young any more.  She extracts ten million from him as indemnity after having been rejected a demand of marriage.  The boss even intends to keep her silent forever, but his controller contrives a plan: in the name of elavating her knowledge level, he suggests the boss pay a sum of a hundred thousand dollars as the tuition to send her into a EMBA class.  There are a galaxy of big names in business, and the mistress soon fascinates all of them.  Less than two months, she has totally disregarded the boss, and more than this, she gives him a million as hush money.

Revelations: The most effective way to tackle with a bad asset is to repackage the asset and transfer it out, not just to throw it away, nor to digest it by yourself.  

PS  This is the unfinished part of my previous posting 試譯 四則很有深度的笑話 - kkuo0810的部落格 - udn部落格, thanks.