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輕鬆一下:笑話及經典傳奇影片
2013/10/28 04:16:43瀏覽1399|回應1|推薦70

(笑話來自朋友的電子郵件)

賣書
  大學 BBS佈告欄的一則佈告:
  「經濟、統計等教科書出售.九成新.幾乎沒有用過,附成績單以茲證明。」
* * * * * * * * * * * * * ** * * * * * *

徵婚

一女子,開出徵婚條件有兩點
1.要帥
2.要有車
電腦去幫她搜尋
結果~~~~

~~~象棋
.....................
這位女子,不服搜出的結果又輸入
1.要有漂亮的房子
2.要有很多錢
電腦去幫她再次搜尋
結果~~~~~~~~

~~~~~~~~~~~銀行
* * * * * * * * * * * * * ** * * * * * *
此女子仍然不服輸的,繼續輸入條件
1要長得酷
2又要有安全感
結果搜出
結果是~~~~~~~~~~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~蝙蝠俠

* * * * * * * * * * * * * ** * * * * * *
此女子仍然不死心的,還繼續輸入條件
1要帥
2要有車
3要有漂亮的房子
4要有很多錢
5要長得酷
6又要有安全感

電腦去幫她再次搜尋 
結果~~~~~~~~~~


~~~~~~~~~在銀行裏下象棋的蝙蝠俠

 
洋 人 夫 妻 的 幽 默

Jokes between husband & wife

 住口 

If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door,
who do you let in first?
如果你的狗在後門吠,而你的妻子在前門大喊大叫,
你會讓那一個先進來?

The Dog of course...at least he ll shut up after you let him in! 
 
當然是狗,至少它進來後會住口。 
 
三個孩子

A couple had three children.
Two of them were bright, smart, and handsome but the third child was dull, ugly, and backward.
   
一對夫婦有三個孩子。
有兩個特別聰明和英俊,可是第三個孩子卻很醜很笨。

   
One day the hubby got suspicious and asked, Tell me the truth, dear.
    Is this third child really mine?

   
一天,丈夫很懷疑地問:"坦白說,親愛的,老三真的是我的孩子嗎?"

    Yes, dear, replied the wife, but the other two are not.

   
"是的,親愛的。"妻子答道:"可是另外兩個不是。" 
  
妻子的三項優點 

When a bachelor marries,
his wife has three qualities she is an economist in the kitchen, an aristocrat in the living room and a devil in bed.
一位單身漢新婚時,妻子有三項優點:
在廚房她是經濟學者、在客廳她是貴族、在床上她是惡魔。
After a few years, sure enough the three qualities remain,
but not in the same order she is an aristocrat in the kitchen, a devil in the living room and an economist in bed.      
若干年後,這三項優點依然存在,可是秩序有點變動:
在廚房她是貴族、在客廳她是惡魔、在床上她是經濟學者。  
* * * * * * * * * * * * * ** * * * * * * 
許願井 

A couple came upon a wishing well.
The husband leaned over, made a wish and threw in a penny.
一對夫妻來到一座許願井。
丈夫靠過去,丟下一個硬幣,許了個願。
The wife decided to make a wish, too. But she leaned over too much, fell into the well, and drowned.
The husband was stunned for a while but then smiled and said, It really works!
   
妻子也打算許個願。可是她靠的太過去,掉下井,被淹死了。
丈夫呆了一回,然後笑著說:"真靈驗。" 
 
結婚周年

I asked my wife, Where do you want to go on our anniversary?
我問太太:"結婚周年紀念,你想去那"

   
She said, Somewhere I have never been!
說:"都好,只要是我沒去過的地方。"
     I told her, How about the kitchen?     
 
說:"廚房怎麼樣?"

 
快樂時光 

During their silver anniversary, a wife reminded her husband, Do you remember when you proposed to me, I was so overwhelmed that I didn t talk for an hour?
在二十五周年紀念時,一位太太提醒她的丈夫:
"你還記得你向我求婚的那天,我被打動得無法說話長達一小時?"
The hubby replied : Yes, honey, that was the happiest hour of my life. 
            丈夫回答:"是的,親愛的,那是我一生中最快樂的時光。" 
 
手拉手

We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops. 
      我們時常都手拉手。如果放開,她就會去購物了....

        笑倒....笑笑笑

经典传奇】 20130912 "鱼泉"之谜

非常不尋常的魚的故事更是人的故事...........
因為堅持看到老父親的夢成真,而兒子的夢想也成真.
雖然人性的貪婪一覽無遺,但至終能捨下--把百分之六十的魚放生保護生態...家庭和睦...非常美的結局


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2013/12/11 11:32
講笑!