I decided to do clothing shopping again this morning.

It’s been 3 weeks for me to get rid of my long-time obsession about buying second-hand 50 NT dollars clothes.

I have piled up too many clothes, but why I still think that I need another new cloth.

This bad addiction really dies hard.

What’s the motivation and drive in this indulgence?

It is greed. A greed that I would benefit more from NT50 clothes than my expense.

It is foolishness. Foolishness that I presume it’s a bargain.

It is a doubt ness. A doubt ness to my beauty and value.

Yes, I am in doubt about my beauty, so I think I need a new dress to uplift my beauty.

In certain down time, I don’t love myself. I would punish myself by many self-criticisms and self-guilty for what mistakes I made and what I have not fulfilled. I realize character contributes to the foremost and latest beauty. It fortifies a woman as her youth fades.

A conduct, a courage, discipline, fortitude, and integrity can do a great deal to make a woman beautiful. As a result, when I find that I am not good enough in my character, I feel depressed and I have the craving for a new dress to certify my beauty. I know it’s too skin-deep to search the beauty outside. The beauty of a woman is not in the clothes she wears, the figure that she carries, or the way she combs her hair. The beauty of a woman is seen in her eyes, because that is the doorway to her heart, the place where love resides. But whenever I can’t find beauty in my eyes or hearts, I need a new dress to open a new opportunity for me to see the beauty in my eyes and then in my heart.

Whenever I feel that my soul is hungry and that no inspiring good books to read, I will motivate to buy a new clothes to reboots my confidence in myself.

      It’s said that the best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or touched but are felt in the heart and beauty is not in the face; beauty is a light in the heart. Yes, everything has beauty, but not everyone sees it. The recipe for beauty is to have less illusion and more Soul, so I aspire to retreat from the belief of pain or pleasure in the body into the unchanging calm and glorious freedom of spiritual harmony. However, search of the spiritual harmony is far more difficult than buying a new dress. Therefore, I would buy material clothes while I can not get my spiritual dress. What are those spiritual dresses for my soul? They are hope, joy, love, and so on. It's beauty that captures people’s attention; personality which captures people’s heart. I confess that there are still too much to be desired in my personality. Although I frequently feel bad about myself, I still try hard to believe myself, value my inner beauty and be open to opportunities, the opportunities to find out my more inside spiritual clothes. How to get them? It’s never as easy as buying clothes, but takes more revolution to earn them.