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這是從社區網站貼過來的。Some old, some new....enjoy. 有些新的，有些舊的。開心一下。
1. The dumbest, most useless thing I ever bought was a 2020 planner. 我買過的最笨，最無用的東西是2020年的行事曆(感恩格友黃彥琳的指正)
2. I was so bored I called Jake from State Farm just to talk to someone. He asked me what I was wearing. 我實在太無聊了，只是想跟人說話。就打電話給州農的保險經紀傑克。他問我我現在穿什麼衣服?
3. In 2019: Stay away from negative people. In 2020: Stay away from positive people 在2019年：遠離那些負面(陰性)的人。在2020年遠離那些正面(陽性確診)的人。
4. The world has turned upside down. Old folks are sneaking out of the house & their kids are yelling at them to stay indoors! 這個世界完全反過來了。老人家偷偷溜出家門，而他們的子女對他們吼叫，要他們待在屋內。
5. This morning I saw a neighbor talking to her dog. It was obvious she thought her dog understood her. I came into my house & told my cat. We laughed a lot.今天早上我看到我的鄰居跟她的狗說話。很明顯的她以為她的狗聽懂她在說什麼，我回到屋內告訴我的貓，我們都笑得很開心。
6. Every few days try your jeans on just to make sure they fit. Pajamas will have you believe all is well in the kingdom 每幾天就要試穿一下你的牛仔褲，只是要確定還穿得進去。 睡衣會讓你相信在這王國裡是最好的。
7. Does anyone know if we can take showers yet... or should we just only keep washing our hands? 有誰知道我們是否可以沖涼了.....還是，我們就只要一直洗手?
8. This virus has done what no woman has been able to do. Cancel sports, shut down all bars & keep men at home! 沒有女人做得到，這個病毒做到了 。取消所有的體育活動，關閉所有的酒巴，和把男人留在家裡。
9. I never thought the comment, “I wouldn’t touch him/her with a 6-foot pole” would become a national policy, but here we are! 我從沒有想這個評語，“我不會碰他/她 以6呎的桿子距離。誰知這會成為全國的政策，但我們是這樣的。
10. I need to practice social-distancing from the refrigerator.
11. I hope the weather is good tomorrow for my trip to the Backyard. I’m getting tired of the Living Room.
12. Never in a million years could I have imagined I would go up to a bank teller wearing a mask & asking for money.就算再多少年我也從沒想過，我會戴著口罩到銀行，跟行員要錢。
13. The spread of COVID-19 is based on 2 things:新冠狀病毒的傳播視：
o How dense the population is. 人口的稠密度
o How dense the population is. 愚蠢人口稠密度(感恩格友Flying Kite的指正)
|( 在地生活｜北美 )|