Dear 子建大哥, First of all, I would like to appreciate your thoughful understanding of my concept behind words. I did struggle between the ideals and reality, dreams and reality, inner voice and outer recognition and even self-satisfation or others' demands or requests. Actually, I am old enough to make the choices satisfy myself in order to appeal to others' expectations. Lots of people might question me why I didn't spend more time doing research or writing something more productive, hahahaha I used to suffer and struggle a lot from the continuous questions and criticism of mine quite often. Lately, I start to appreciate my crazy thoughts since I regard them as my beautiful gifts I present to myself at the age of 34. I know if I don't note down or record those silly thoughts, those previous and precious thoughts of mine at the age of 34 will just be gone with the wind as time goes by. I have achieved lots of goals what others set for me or I set for myself, and it is high time for me to enjoy myself during the process in my own pace, manners, speed or space. I am glad and proud to say what I have done is my choices and my decisions. I just follow the call of my inner voice and take responsibility for what I have done while enjoying myself in the process. Haha, something can wait, but some moments can't. Just like the current moment, I feel like typing this long passage to show my highest gratitude toward you, 子建大哥, is what I regard as some moment can't wait. I can't wait to show my thankfulness for your total understanding and thoughtful encouragement. Thanks again. Wish you a great day. And I will head for my happiness with my pace and manner. Helen
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