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海倫‧凱勒:The Story of My Life (14)
2007/02/28 01:11:50瀏覽1596|回應0|推薦10

Helen Adams KellerThe Story of My Life (14)

海倫‧凱勒   東年 

老師在來後的第一個早上,帶我去她房間,送我一個娃娃。那是柏金斯學院盲童送的,而蘿菈‧布里基曼為它縫製衣服;但是,我後來才知道這樣的來由。當我玩了一下下,蘇利文小姐在我手心很慢的寫了娃娃這字,我立刻對這手指的遊戲感興趣,並且試著模仿這動作。終於成功無誤拼好字的時候,我激動的充滿孩子氣的喜悅和得意。我跑下樓去找我母親,舉起我的手寫出娃娃這字。我並不知道我是在拼寫一個字,甚至於不知道文字的存在;只簡單是以手指做猴仔般的模仿。後來的幾天我以這種莫名其妙的方法學習了很多很多字,諸如別針、帽子、杯子,還有幾個動詞,像坐、立和走。但是,我是在好幾個星期之後,才明白原來一切事物都有一個名字。

有一天,我正在玩我的新娃娃,蘇利文小姐也將我那個磨舊的大娃娃放在我的膝蓋上,然後在我手心拼寫娃娃這個字,試圖讓我明白娃娃這個字適用於這兩個不同的娃娃。這一天早先時候,我們已經為杯子爭辯過了。她一直試著讓我牢牢記住杯子是杯子、是水,可是我堅持杯子就是水這樣的混淆。後來她喪失了信心,暫時就放棄了那個話題,僅在這個時機首次再提起。我不耐煩她再三的嘗試,就抓住那個新娃娃在地上猛砸。當我感覺到我已將娃娃砸碎在腳下,也感覺倍加的愉快;在情緒爆發之後,我既不悲痛也不懊惱。我還沒喜歡上那個新娃娃,在我活著的靜止不動的黑暗世界裡,沒有過多親切的感情。我的老師將娃娃的碎片,掃到壁爐地面的一邊;這讓我不安的原因離去,讓我鬆了一口氣。她拿出我的帽子,我就知道我將出門去曬太陽。這樣的思想(假使一種無法描述的知覺可以被稱為思想),讓我快樂得手舞腳蹈。

The morning after my teacher came she led me into her room and gave me a doll. The little blind children at the Perkins Institution had sent it and Laura Bridgman had dressed it; but I did not know this until afterward. When I had played with it a little while, Miss Sullivan slowly spelled into my hand the word "d-o-l-l." I was at once interested in this finger play and tried to imitate it. When I finally succeeded in making the letters correctly I was flushed with childish pleasure and pride. Running downstairs to my mother I held up my hand and made the letters for doll. I did not know that I was spelling a word or even that words existed; I was simply making my fingers go in monkey-like imitation. In the days that followed I learned to spell in this uncomprehending way a great many words, among them pin, hat, cup and a few verbs like sit, stand and walk. But my teacher had been with me several weeks before I understood that everything has a name.

One day, while I was playing with my new doll, Miss Sullivan put my big rag doll into my lap also, spelled "d-o-l-l" and tried to make me understand that "d-o-l-l" applied to both. Earlier in the day we had had a tussle over the words "m-u-g" and "w-a-t-e-r." Miss Sullivan had tried to impress it upon me that "m-u-g" is mug and that "w-a-t-e-r" is water, but I persisted in confounding the two. In despair she had dropped the subject for the time, only to renew it at the first opportunity. I became impatient at her repeated attempts and, seizing the new doll, I dashed it upon the floor. I was keenly delighted when I felt the fragments of the broken doll at my foot. Neither sorrow nor regret followed my passionate outburst. I had not loved the doll. In the still, dark world in which I lived there was no strong sentiment of tenderness. I felt my teacher sweep the fragments to one side of the hearth, and I had a sense of satisfaction that the cause of my discomfort was removed. She brought me my hat, and I knew I was going out into the warm sunshine. This thought, if a wordless sensation may be called a thought, made me hop and skip with pleasure.

( 心情隨筆心靈 )
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