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| 2021/07/26 01:35:21瀏覽18｜回應0｜推薦0 | |
| Once upon a time, I said I was going to post my favourite feminist parenting links every Sunday. I failed spectacularly. So here’s a lovely bunch of links for your reading pleasure, and now I’ll try to do it every Friday. Honest! :D Also I promise I will write a proper post soon, as Ruth has been pretty much holding us up for a while (thanks Ruth, your posts rock, and remind me to pull my finger out and write something of worth here myself) just as soon as I’m not being pulled in forty directions at once. ;) So here are some interesting things for you to read in the meantime:
Should we not dress girls in pink? “Sue Palmer, author of Toxic Childhood, says the “total obsession” with pink stunts girls’ personalities. “I am very worried about it. You can’t find girls over the age of three who aren’t obsessed with the colour. It’s under their skin from a very early age and severely limits choices, and decisions. We have got to get something done about the effect marketeers are having. We are creating little fluffy pink princess, an image of girliness, that is very specific and which some girls don’t want to go along with, but due to overwhelming peer pressure, are having to conform to. So successful have toymakers been in creating a girl’s world painted purely pink, that a study by speech therapists in Durham shows children having no problem identifying the colour blue, but saying “Barbie” when shown pink.” Why feminists shouldn’t have to keep mum As a feminist and a mother, I think recent (and indeed not so recent) feminist positions on pregnancy, motherhood and childcare blow the alternatives out of the water. The central chapters of French’s The Women’s Room cover in wonderful, painful detail just how boring, lonely and restrictive caring for children full-time can be. This is not an instance of a feminist demeaning or attacking mothers. It’s an impassioned cry for help and support, and one that we shouldn’t be drowning out with mutterings about how all mothers really need is more respect. I’m so thankful I read The Women’s Room and other works before becoming a mother myself, as I was able to go into it with my eyes open, and find a different way of living with my partner and son, one which made sense for us as individuals, not as play-actors taking on the mummy and daddy roles that most people struggle to shoehorn themselves into. Time to end parental leave discrimination Parental leave entitlements In the UK are the most asymmetric in Europe. The mother gets six weeks of maternity leave paid at 90% of her weekly salary; a further 33 weeks at the statutory maternity pay level (£117.18 a week, or 90% of salary if this is lower); and a further 13 weeks unpaid. The current government has taken several steps to increase this amount, and the proportion that is paid, and this is commendable. The mother’s partner gets two weeks at the statutory pay level and no more. (Despite being called paternity leave, the partner doesn’t have to be the father, and doesn’t have to be male.) The Other Half Of The Choice “While the right to have an abortion is definitely important, so is becoming a mother. Where are the spaces in which we discuss this choice actively and the changes and sacrifices that it entails? Where are the places that we openly celebrate the joy the comes with bringing a new life into this world? Destruction and Mayhem are the love of my life, and yet in most feminist spaces it feels as though this love no matter how great, can only be conceptualized in the ways it which creates poverty, or stress. Where are the places that we talk about the laughter that we share with our children, or the moments when they make you so proud that your chest positively swells.” PinkStinks – The Campaign for real role models Aimed at girls between the ages of 6 and 12 years old and their parents. We believe that the media’s obsession with stick-thin models, footballers’ wives, and overtly sexualised pop stars is denying girls their right to aspire to and learn from real role models. We aim to redress the balance by providing girls with positive female role models, chosen because of their achievements, skills, accomplishments and successes. … We believe that these images of women should be ubiquitous, not the overtly sexualised ones we have all become so used to and accept as the norm. Whilst we are often more than familiar with the inane and inconsequential exploits of many ‘celebrities’, we seem blissfully unaware that there are women out there discovering cures for cancer, saving the environment, leading nations, travelling into space and breaking sporting records. It’s these women that need exposure in order to inspire, motivate, encourage and enthuse our girls. Breastfeeding is NOT illegal! “There has never been any indication from the Government, police, courts or any official body that under any circumstances would breastfeeding in public be regarded as ‘lewd and lascivious’ behavior. There has never been any arrest, let alone trial or conviction, and any decent lawyer would get this laughed out of court instantly by showing the sexual inadequacies of those prosecuting if they suggested that they found breastfeeding ‘lewd’. To repeat – merely showing a naked breast, with or without a naked nipple, is never indecent. The indecency laws do not and never have applied, and any suggestion that they do is helping the opponents of breastfeeding discourage public breastfeeding.” Angelina Jolie: The Worlds Greatest Mother There is nothing that Angelina does on an ordinary day to differentiate herself from any other mother. She does not love her children anymore than I love mine. I am sick and tired that every time we seek to praise some key aspect of women’s lives it is always represented by a rich white woman of privilege. Enough of the monolithic womanhood. Enough of the erasure of women of colour. There can be no sisterhood as long as we are not represented in discussions that are central to women’s lives. The whole idea of a white woman being the ideal and sole representative of motherhood is insulting. It is time to step off of the pedestal Jolie, despite your high ranking on the coolness meter, motherhood is about more than class and race. International Mothers Network The initial goal of the IMN is to invite mother organizations from around the world to join this network; in particular, progressive mothers groups – mothers from the global south, mothers in poverty, mothers with disabilities, welfare mothers, grandmother caregivers and others. Our hope is that the network will lead to a more mother-centred world by bringing together diverse mother groups to work toward influencing public discussion as well as exploring alternate economic and societal structures. The IMN will provide a sense of community, promote public awareness and affect change. Breastfeeding Bingo! “My breastfeeding bingo game… turned into a postcard by Lisa at Lactivist! Basically you get bingo when you have received all of the comments on the postcard… a full house!” Salma Hayek “still” breastfeeding – world can’t decide whether to jerk off or prosecute “This is a montage of images from hyperventilating stories about Salma Hayek “Still”! Breastfeeding! At! 13! Months! The world has burst into a babblefest of gossip about how bizarre this is. There has been an outpouring of shock and disdain, complete with accusations of perversity and child sexual abuse. Here’s a sampling of the buzz. …Why are the presses stopped? Because Salma Hayek’s breasts are public property, that’s why.” Girl Dolls That Look Like Actual Girls “These dolls look like girls. Not babies or late adolescents, but girls. And the business was started by a Western Australian woman, Helen Schofield. The characters have actual hobbies that don’t involve conspicuous consumption or beauty rituals. Amy plays sports, Belle snorkels at the beach, Jasmine is a muso, and Emily loves animals and is rocking her hiking boots. None of them are ‘sassy’ or ‘foxy’ or ‘hot’.” About Feminist Mothers “Here are 10 11 thoughts on the experience of feminist mothers from a bunch of great women thinkers. I tried to choose quotes that would cover a range of experiences for mothers today and I looked for quotes that stopped me in my tracks and made me think. Most of these quotes sounded like more eloquent versions of my own private thoughts.” Barbarous Rituals – 84 Ways To Feminize Humans An amazing, insightful and thought-provoking list of ways in which human beings are feminised, how little girls are taught to be ‘girls’ and how the way is paved for the othering of women throughout their lives. From Documents From The Women’s Liberation Movement. Pro Choice Because I Am A Mother “Then there are those magazines that tell you what a home is “supposed to look like” and you find yourself dreaming about not having an elmo chair that giggles and rotates as the centrepiece of your living room. How about discovering that your child has their own taste in decorating as they scribble on walls and peel and eat your wallpaper. No need to be on trading spaces with kids, they’ll do the work for you. There are also times when you will fantasize about the day when walking down your stairs is not going to constitute an act of bravery because of the toys left there; who knew breaking a finger could hurt that badly. How about learning that no matter how amazing the lego structures looks, stepping on one early in the morning hurts like hell.” Pink, It’s The Colour Of… “Where I did find pink was for services that were exclusively for women. There’s a taxi service in Mumbai that’s supposed to be especially for women. And sure enough, it had a pink thing going — the cars had a pink line painted somewhere and the female chauffeurs wore pink uniforms. More googling revealed that similar women’s only taxi services in the UK and in Russia and almost everywhere else also had pink names and pink themes. It is clear that pink is seen as a women’s colour in many places, and it is also clear that wherever this prejudice prevails, pink seems to vanish from the public eye. And it is not like I am surprised. If something is defined as definitely, exclusively meant for one group of people, the other group is made uncomfortable by it. In a world where everything must sell, nobody can afford to alienate customers.” Feminist Parenting: The TV Dilemma “Knowing that the media can play a strong role in shaping how children see themselves, many parents come to view television as a mixed blessing. On the one hand, lots of television programs are educational, and can provide over-worked parents with a way to entertain the kids for a few minutes while meals are prepared or little sister’s diapers are changed. On the other, even ‘family friendly’ programs might include messages dangerous to a kid’s self-esteem – and the commercials are sure to play-up all the gender stereotypes that could help build better little consumers. So, what are feminist moms and dads (and feminist aunts, uncles, and babysitters) to do? We clearly want kids to benefit from the good, but not be exposed to the bad.” The baby blues: Study finds a third of mothers slip down career ladder “For decades mothers of young children have complained about not being taken seriously in the workplace, but research published today reveals for the first time the extent to which professional women are forced to slide down the career ladder to find jobs that allow them to spend time with their family. Women managers wanting to work part-time after a baby are seeing their talents and qualifications wasted because they can only find employment well below their skill levels, according to the most comprehensive UK study of the impact of motherhood on careers. Almost half of women professionals who downgrade to lower skilled part-time roles move to jobs where the average employee does not have A-levels, leaving three years or more of higher level education and training underused, according to academics at Oxford University and University of East Anglia.” How to raise a feminist son ” I have spent a lot of time asking myself this very, very important question: How do I teach my son to not abuse his privilege? To be sure, I recognize the privilege my son received by accident of birth. He was born to two white, middle-class parents. I have a college education, as does my current partner and my son’s father. He is an only child, and has four grandparents in his life that absolutely dote on him. There is a never-ending supply of love, learning, and involvement. My son has opportunities that many children are not blessed with. Obviously, I don’t think I’m the perfect parent, nor is his environment guaranteed to always work in his favor. I make mistakes, I do stupid things, and I don’t spend nearly enough time thinking about how my parenting reflects my feminist beliefs. However, I do spend a lot of time analyzing the role that early childhood shapes who we become, and especially how parental beliefs can conflict with what society teaches our children. Below are some of my musings – I would love to have a conversation about how we should be raising young boys to actively engage in our world in a feminist manner.” Lesson one in “Mother Blaming and Shaming” “What happens when the most productive work on the planet isn’t recognised? What happens when this work, the work of rearing the next generation of productive workers is mythologised into ”mothers are angels in training”? This is what happens. Any success you achieve goes uncelebrated as work, because this work, while done with love, is really just ’nurturing’, an innate biological function of your gender, a generosity and a purity that came with your ovaries. And any failures you experience, rather than being related to the complexity of the work or the precariousness of your status as an invisible worker, are instead nothing short of your own moral failure.” |
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