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Make me up, buttercup
2021/08/17 23:24:19瀏覽31|回應0|推薦0
Today at work was our last Spa Day (it got extended due to its popularity, wonder of wonders). I immediately signed up for another massage because DUDE. Free massage!

I also signed up for a free makeup session. The makeup guy was totally professional, knowledgeable, sweet and most importantly, gushingly complimentary toward my face. (Apparently, my eyes aren’t “brown,” they are a “pretty shade of amber.” And instead of referring to my skin tone as “corpse-like white,” he called it “porcelain.” HA.)

I’m pretty sure his greatest challenge, however, was preventing himself from rolling his eyes at me every time he asked a makeup question:

“What kind of eye makeup do you typically use?”

“Uhhh…you’re looking at it.”

“Oh. So you don’t typically wear eye makeup, then.”

“That is correct.”

“Does your moisturizer have SPF in it?”

“Umm…I don’t use moisturizer…or SPF…but I use Carmex on my lips! Does that have SPF?”

Luckily, he didn’t laugh or chastise me, but instead carefully explained exactly what he was doing as he masterfully mixed shadows and daubed on liquid eye shadow and patted my lids with brushes and Q-tips, and generally stuck his fashionable boot-clad foot over the line that indicates Nearly Touching My Eyeball Land, while I squirmed and fidgeted and tried not to blink or think about how my contacts will later exact their revenge.

And I learned, finally, the correct way to apply eye shadow, which, let’s face it, is the main reason I never wear eye makeup, unruly contacts notwithstanding. I have no less than three 4-color eye shadow sets and yet I have no clue about how to layer the colors. None. So I stick with the boring brown shades and instead of making my eyes pop, I essentially make them invisible.

So, girls (and rock star boys), here’s what I learned today about applying multiple colors of eye shadow (you probably already know this, but I am a makeup moron):

[The four colors he used on me were pretty natural: white, taupe, pink and charcoal gray]

Start with the neutral shade (in my case, taupe) and apply it with a small, rounded brush from lash line to eyebrow.

Take a smaller brush and apply the next-lightest color (white for me) in a thin line under the brow line. Dab a teeny amount in the corners of your eye lids to brighten your eyes.

If you want, at this point you can use a liquid eye shadow on your lids to add shimmer and to act as a base for your main eye shadow color. (He used a shimmery white on me.) Use the brush from Step 1 again to apply your color (for me, pink) on your lids over the liquid shadow.

Note: Your eyes will start to feel heavy with gunk. Do not be alarmed. Apparently, this is normal. Also, your contacts will imagine they have 517 specks of dust in them. They are overreacting. Ignore them.

Finish with a skinny square brush by sweeping a line of shadow (for me, charcoal gray) along your lash line.

If you want eyeliner, apply it in your lash line, not above it. And apply it starting where your lashes are the thickest, not right at the corner of your eye. This way it will emphasize your lashes at their thickest point and make your eyes pop.

Apply mascara in a downward motion first, so it will get rid of any eye shadow powder that fell on your lashes previously. Then apply a second coat while brushing upwards. You can either curl your lashes before this or use a curling mascara.

Ta-da! You’re now beautiful and can call your husband and beg him to take you somewhere nice for dinner instead of sitting at home eating leftover spaghetti with bacon. Although it’s spaghetti with bacon, so maybe you’ll just eat at home looking all sultry and sexy.
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