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| 2009/02/20 11:22:25瀏覽818｜回應1｜推薦6 | |
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【前文提到德州大哥叫了輛計程車來到H市某空軍基地，在一扇猙獰的大門前等人接他進去報到就職。】 The orderly drove up to the gate in a 3/4-jeep. Making a sharp U-turn in front of the gate he waved at the guard to open the gate for me. When it closed behind me as I walked through , I took one last tender look at the sky outside, feeling tomb-in and figuring this would be my grave for the next two years before resurrection. The orderly asked me in a surprisingly civil and polite manner to get into the jeep and we drove on toward the heart of the base. It was a military airport and I saw all sorts of people and gears there; more of what I would expect from an industrial zone than from a military base. We stopped in front of a metal building that must have once served as an airplane hanger. Stepping out of the car first he held the door open for me, then bade me to follow him as he lead our way through a maze created by hundred of desks each with a clerk staffed behind it, a few in civilian clothes but most in uniforms, all looking busy writing or filing something (or pretending so, one never truly knows). As we waltzed by I had this strange feeling of people suddenly dropped whatever they were doing and stared at me as if I belonged to some endangered spices; I could feel their stares pinned on my back until we turned the corner and stepped into a more private corridor. I was led to a separate office surrounded by glass panels with a young looking captain sitting inside. The orderly knocked on the door and the captain raised his head, smiled at me and bade me to come in. I thought to myself, “Fuck, this place ain’t too bad and I might just get used to it.” I got in, saluted him, and started searching through my backpack for my papers when he suggested we put it off for now as he had received a direct order to take me straight to the commander of the fighter group once I arrived. I was a bit flattered, to tell the truth; a little tiny ROTC lieutenant like me seeing the fighter group commander? Hallelujah! This shit might just work! 【大門開處，他忽然仿佛置身雲端夢遊仙境。先是文雅有禮的傳令兵開吉普車載他直驅基地中心；他高坐軒車之中，見基地中的人忙碌如螻蟻，而自己一個小少尉卻被人待若上賓。傳令兵領他進入舊停機棚改建的辦公中心，穿過上百位文書人員構成的迷宮，見到一位相貌年輕的上尉。大哥正欲從背包中翻出報到文件，上尉微笑的叫他別急。上頭來的直接命令要他立時帶德州大哥去見戰鬥指揮官！ 這段有聊齋故事的趣味：落魄書生，誤蹈仙境，被仙僕導入九重殿閣，參見宮主；宮主一見大悅，寵以青眼，委任清貴，妻以仙姬 ...】 On our way to the commander's office, we chatted as if we’re a pair of dear old Oxford fellows (metaphorically speaking so no Broke Back Mountain jokes here, please). After hopping in and out from one tin-roof building to another, we finally reached and entered this one that stood out separately from the main cluster, similar to all others we had passed by in shape and taste but much smaller in size. Once we stepped inside, the place, however, felt more like a lounge than a command center; it was carpeted from wall to wall and the lighting was gentle and warm. He took me down the hallway and after making a few mysterious turns confusing the hell out of me, we stopped outside the commander's private office with a silver wing nailed to the door. The captain went in first to give commander a heads-up about my arrival and in no time the commander came out to greet me. He ignored my salute and came straight to me with his hand extended, asking for a handshake, which he executed enthusiastically, if not affectionately. He asked me how was my trip to here and confirmed with the captain that my quarter had been prepared to the exact specification he had dictated earlier. While we were at it, two young men wearing orange color jumpsuits kicked open the door and marched into our hallway casually. One of them intentionally bumped me on the shoulder while he squeezed past us, before heading straight into commander’s office. Judging from their faces they were both older than me, but not by much, probably around 5 years (6 at top). The commander was a bit annoyed and embarrassed by such a behavior so he apologized to me, hoping that I of all people would have understood how some of the fly boys might occasionally had this attitude thing with the commissaries, or political officers. 【他於是隨著上尉迂迴進出一座座鐵皮小閣，輕趁閑步望指揮官辦公室而行。他與上尉雖初照面，但意氣相投，攀談之際如同牛津舊識（但非斷袖之情，切莫誤會）。終於來到指揮官駐錫之殿。殿中錦茵鋪地，柔光宜人，指揮官從內室奔出，幾乎是倒屣相迎，緊握德州大哥肥厚的手不放。「此來旅途如意否？」指揮官堆歡寒暄：「你的住處我已親自關照預備好了」。賓主二人正情致殷殷的時候，兩位飛官忽踢門而入，旁若無人，其中一人還有意無意撞了德州大哥一下。指揮官見狀，微露不懌之色，遂向大哥致歉：「哈哈，有些飛官就是這樣，看政戰官不太對眼。我想你一定能了解，哈哈」。】 And that was when all hell broke loose. 【大哥自我打量：我不是政戰官啊？事情有點不太對頭。從此情況急轉直下，好像地獄的閘門打開了，黑風飆起妖魔盡出。】 I begged him to stop because by then I had sensed something went seriously wrong. When I told them that they must have got the wrong guy they appeared surprised, looking stupidly at each other for a few second (feels like eternity, though), until the captain broke the silence by asking me was I not lieutenant XYZ (my last name), the newly appointed squadron political officer? I told him the last name matched but that was where the similarity ended; I was meant to be the electronic-warfare officer and for crying out loud wasn’t even a KMT party member (you had to be one to become a political officer). The commander asked me how the devil did I get into his base so I repeated the entire story to him, the Navy, the drunken colonel, the hostile captain, the gendarmes and finally the good natured captain here. While I was giving him the detail accounts of my personal campaign, I saw his face turn red, his shirt collar get tight and steams come out of his ears ( O.K. you got me, I imagined that last part). He tried his best listening to my narratives all the way up to how I finally walked into this office 5 minutes ago before he let the dam bust. Waving his both arms furiously at me to shut the fuck up, he stared hatefully at the captain and ordered him with that same stare to move his sorry piece of ass into his office, right now. They went in and slammed the door closed behind them but through the light-weighted door everyone in the building could hear the commander cuss and swear at the captain and all the female members from his forking family tree. Boy he made sure that the poor captain had a good earful of it before he kicked him out. The door opened again and out came the captain walking toward me solemnly. With a quick nodding motion of his head pointing at the door he hinted me to follow him out. Sheepishly I rode on his heels out of the hot zone. 【指揮官還繼續笑容可掬的套近乎，大哥卻如入冰窖，勉力懇請他暫停一下。「你們搞錯人了」，大哥說。指揮官和上尉兩人癡呆的對望，無法了解這句話的意思。過了一會，上尉終於打破了沉默問道：「你不是姓XYZ嗎？剛剛派命為中隊的政戰官不是？」於是大哥解釋，他雖也姓XYZ，但除此之外和那位政戰官風馬牛；他應該是電子官，況且連國民黨員都不是，怎麼可能當政戰官呢？「那你來我的地盤搞什麼名堂？」指揮官質問道。於是大哥又被迫打竹板話當年，從海軍、空軍總部的酒糟上校兇惡上尉、H市車站的倆憲兵、一直到說到此間這名好心的上尉和熱情四海的指揮官。指揮官聽了大哥的絮絮叨叨，再也按捺不住，一霎時脾氣如山洪暴發，命他閉嘴，然後把上尉叫進內室大肆轟炸了一頓，可憐的上尉家族中所有的女性同胞也遭池魚之殃。之後兩名頹喪的牛津舊識被喝令離開“戰區”。 上述事件具體而微的總結了過去半世紀以來國民黨軍隊的實戰模式：一、上級轟炸下級；二、軍士官兵互相轟炸彼此家族中的女性同胞。我不免聯想到民進黨八年執政諸公及黨務要員，雖不恥與國民黨軍隊同為一丘之貉，但習慣轟炸女性同胞之習性則一。】 We walked side by side in total silence for a few minutes, tracing our way back along the paths we came from. Before we reached the hanger where I first met him, he made a stop in front of another tin-can building, pushed open a side door and bade me to come, again without saying a word but with a twitch of his neck and head. I followed him and found myself inside a canteen with a full bar and tables. He went to the corner, took out a few coins from his pocket and popped out two cokes from the vending machine. He handed one to me; it was a coke classic in glass bottle, something no one seems to remember any more. We grabbed a table and sit down, silently sipping our pops as if we had jut got out of a funeral; to some extend, we were, of his career I supposed. I was actually sort of fond of this guy as he was quite a pleasant chap to talk to and felt kind of sorry for him. So I opened up the box by apologizing for the disasters I might have brought him. He told me not to mind while shrugging his shoulders and said he got only himself to blame for as he should have checked my order first. I asked him were they expecting another ROTC and he said yes, someone with the same last name but that was all he would said; once he realized that he was not supposed to talk to anyone else about it, and probably me in particular, he stopped. I might be scared but not scared stupid yet; this much I figured: some hot shot cadet straight out of the political officer academy (and puberty as well) got 'assigned' to this unit and the commander needed, probably wanted too, to take care of this punk as a promise he made to someone else. Then the poor me had to wander in like a lost soul with the worst timing possible to foul up the entire setting. Imaging yourself stepping into a surprised party thrown for a really popular guy by mistake and now everyone hates you, that’s probably where I stood then and there. Fortunately all these happened at a time when I still knew when and how to keep my trap shut so I quietly finished my coke and waited to see what sort of plan he had in mind for me. 【這上尉是個好人，被主官臭罵了一頓之後並未遷怒於大哥，還請他喝可樂。大哥自己忖度：指揮官必定是受某要人之託照顧剛甫從政戰學校畢業的新科少尉，誰知自己陰錯陽差在最不該出現的時候出現，目睹指揮官脅肩諂笑的身段，讓上官大大出糗。 諸位請聽了：絕大多數的上官勃然大怒，都是因為要遮掩醜態。為什麼有人就是不得上官歡心？原因很多，其中一項就是不小心看到了不該看到的醜態。為什麼有人就是能討上官歡心？原因也很多，但其中重要的一項就是要讓上官看到醜態而不以為恥，這樣上官就放心了。北橋客雖愚直，仍粗曉做官之道，雖不能至，心嚮往焉。】 Once he's done with his drink we got up and went back to his office. After waiving his orderly off he popped open a pack of cigarettes, put one in his mouth and offer me one as well. I took out my lighter and lighted for both of us. Pushing a chair back and sitting on it puffing smokes, I watched him make a string of phone calls with a burning coffin nail hanging on to the corner of his mouth. After several unsuccessful attempts, someone on the other side of the phone finally caught his attention as he suddenly sit straight up. Throwing the cigarette butt to the ground and crushing it out with a few quick heavy twists from his shoe, he listened attentively to what the other guy had to say over the phone. Covering up the mouth piece he asked me what was my specialty and when I told him electronics and communication gears he informed (loudly) whomever it was on the other end of the line that he had got their piece of fresh meat by mistake and begged them to send someone over ASAP to take the hot potato (yours truly here) off his hand. After hanging up the phone he looked very relaxed and offered me another cigarette (it was my fifth straight) smilingly. I gathered up my courage to ask him where I would be send to. He said to a unit at the far end of the base where they fixed and tested equipments; but for a short-timer like me there's nothing to worry about as the place was generally known to be a retirement home among them pros. I asked him what would happen to him after all the shit having been flying around and he said it’s not that big a deal; shit happened and he would take the old man out to eat some dog meat and bought him a 5-bucks worth of crack-whore tonight to patch things up and at that we both laughed. 【喝完可樂回到上尉的辦公室，上尉邊抽煙邊替身旁這個無主的天將找尋歸宿。幾通電話之後終於有了線索。只見上尉從座位上直起身子，把煙頭一扔，對著電話大喊，「你們的一隻菜鳥在我這裡，求你們快來把這燙手山芋給帶走！」 上尉鬆了口氣，又遞給大哥一根煙 - 是第五根了。大哥怯怯的問新單位在哪裡。「放心，」上尉答道，「是個職業老鳥的養老單位，在基地的另一頭，修修設備罷了。」至於如何修復與指揮官的關係呢？上尉氣定神閑的說：「沒事，今晚請他吃頓狗食打個野炮就擺平了」，說罷二人撫掌而笑。】 Half an hour later, the orderly knocked on the door and told the captain that some other officer was here to see him. He went out to check out the caller but came back immediately telling me that my ride had arrived. I thanked him for his help and he escorted me out to the door where another jeep was standing by with a lieutenant in the driver's seat. This officer was definitely younger than me and judging from his rank I dare say he wasn't an Air force Academy regular but one of the quickies from the two years accelerated program designed for people coming in with a two-year associate degree. He, just as the previous one, looked like a good natured fellow–believe it or not, most people are. As he switched the gear into forward, he asked me whether I had eaten already (it was way passed 5 pm, chow time for military base). When I told him that I haven’t had anything since the morning beside a bottle of coke, he pondered for a moment and swirled the car around. We drove on for another few minutes until he stopped the car in front of another canteen. He explained to me that since I had not officially reported in for duty, I couldn't eat at their canteen as they had not got me enrolled into their expense account. But this one here was opened to the civilian contractors and if I didn’t mind paying my own meal for this one time he would wait for me in the car while I ate. I was very touched by the gesture and took the offer by rushing into the place, gobbled down a bowl of steamy noodles that almost choked me and ran back to the car, all within 5 minutes. 【半小時後來了一輛吉普把大哥接走。開車的是位少尉，比大哥還年輕；從他的官階看來，肯定不是空官正期出身的。他和前面那位上尉一樣，看來也是心地良善之輩。當時已經5點，到了軍中晚飯時間，他問大哥吃了沒有？可憐的大哥從早到現在除了一瓶可樂之外沒有米水下肚。少尉想了想，把車子一旋，開到一個福利社前停下，說道：「你還沒正式報到，所以還不能吃軍中的伙食。這個福利社對民間雇員開放，如果你不介意自己付錢，不如進去吃個飯，我可以在車上等你」。大哥深受感動，於是衝入福利社，5分鐘內狼吞虎嚥了一碗熱騰騰的麵。 大部分人的本性都是善良的，如大哥所說。善心常在一念之間，善行有時只是舉手之勞，卻讓人紀念一輩子。更有人雖然生活在惡質的環境中，卻不拿環境之惡為冷漠的藉口、為不行善的擋箭牌 - 這樣的人乃是有俠肝義膽，真真難得了。】 We headed straight to the living quarters assigned to his unit and he helped me checked in. He told me to pick any bed I wished as I would be the only officer living here; everyone else were the pros with family and lived in the family housing compound off the base. He advised me to rest a bit while he went back to the brigade to finish my paperwork. Tell you what, it felt like heaven to finally be able to lie flat on your back and puff on a cigarette, after being on the move for 10 hours non-stop. Before I almost dozed off in this state of complete relaxation, the lieutenant came back in with a deep concerned look looming all over his face. He told me that he had twice checked with the HQ in Taipei and there’s no record showing that they should be expecting anyone new; he was further advised by them to check with the only other unit around this area, about which all they could give him was a weirdly sounding street address. He asked me to gather my stuffs and go check out this place with him. 【少尉帶大哥到所屬的單位宿舍，要他挑一張床鋪暫時休息一下。大哥躺在床上，點一根煙；馬不停蹄了跑了10個鐘頭，一天下來也該倦了。正漸漸放鬆欲昏昏睡去，小少尉匆匆回來，面有憂色。「和臺北總部兩度勘對資料的結果，發現我們這裡根本就不需要新員。這附近只剩另一個單位，他們給了我一個奇怪的地址，你收拾東西跟我去查查。」】 It was not until we drove past the gate, out toward the city again, that I realized I might be in some new shit deeper than I originally anticipated. I knew the city well so I followed his driving direction carefully, trying to guess out where my new unit might be. We went into a small alley not too far off from the main street where there was a famous flea market that I frequented in my college days. He slowed the jeep down after we had entered the alley and made an immediate sharp left turn into a court yard where he stopped the car and cut the engine. The yard was quite large, surrounded from all sides by yellow-grayish brick walls mounted with sharp broken glass pieces made out of beer bottles, all cemented in – a poor man's version of barbwires. 【二人驅車離開基地，重返市區。大哥在H市念了六年書，乃識途老馬；不久車子駛入一個小巷，他記起不遠處有一跳蚤市場，是他大學時候常流連之地。車子進入小巷後放慢了速度，緊接著一個左轉，停在一個廣場上。廣場挺大，四圍皆灰黃的磚牆，牆頭上用水泥泥著碎酒瓶玻璃，是當年臺灣常見的廉價防盜措施。大哥心中忐忑，未審此行是吉是凶。】 --- 欲知後事如何，請聽下回分解 --- |
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