八十高齡的父母，挺著疼女兒的心，迢遙數千哩來看我。

我五月請了幾天假，帶他們出外旅遊。頭日車程約八小時，由北卡北行費城，後三日再逐漸南回，最後一天，在華府的國家藝術館遊賞了大半日，傍晚橫了心，決定連夜開回家。兒子和爸媽一行人怕我累，路上輪流撐著精神陪我。我在95號州際高速公路上急行，由淺晚至深夜，注意力得費心凝的緊，但心情是輕鬆安定的。這在深夜不慌的境界，是花了半生修來的。

我小時甚是怕黑，哥哥若是吵架過後想報復，只要藏身在黑暗中，略施小計，「赤扒扒」的我，便登時軟趴在地。大學時代夜遊，男同學從樹叢中跳出來，好強的我便噗通跪地落淚。記憶尤深的是，十歲左右的一個夜裡，我痴痴躅足家門口的路燈下，等著外出的爸媽歸來，每一分秒拉距極恐懼的張力，我雖是怕黑，但更怕家人不歸！

我心底明白，我這對黑夜帶來的慌心，不是我獨有的童年經驗。黑暗和它隱藏的未知，所帶來的不安，多半會逐年在每一個人的成長過程中淡去。然後， 在未來的生活中，逐漸堅強，成究為對依靠我們的人，黑夜的捍衛者！

黑夜不代表陰暗，陰暗也不定能吞噬正向的精神。有心愛的人與我同行，依在身邊或掛在心上，長長的夜路，也不生慌心。

因為，黑暗中有你！

黑暗中的美麗奇蹟  (@Baltimore National Aquarium, May 27, 2016)

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Out of their love for me, my 80-years-old parents endured a journey of thousands of miles, crossing the Pacific Ocean to visit me in North Carolina.

In May, we took a trip north-bound on I95 along the East coast. The first day was a tough one; with some traffic delay, it cost me 8 hours behind the wheel to reach Philadelphia. After two days in Philly, we then headed back south, stopping by Baltimore and Washington DC.  The Aquarium at Baltimore's Inner Harbor was eye-opening impressive and the National Gallery of Art in DC served a great finale. On the last day, the thought of sleeping in my own bed outweighed my fatigue, and so I decided to make the 5-hr drive home after dinner.  My parents and son were concerned about me driving through the night and took turns to stay awake to keep me company. The demand of concentration was indeed consuming; however, I was relaxed and calm, even enjoying it somewhat. Being able to embrace the lonely freeway in the depth of night did not come easy.

As a child, I was extremely terrified of darkness, so much so that my brother figured out the easiest way to bring this feisty girl to her knees was simpily to plant surprises in the nights. During college, a mischievous college friend, after jumping out from the woods during a night outing, was soon guilt-ridden to find me weeping uncontrollably on the ground. The fear of darkness stretched further to the fear for loss or unknown. One of the most agonizing childhood memory I had was, during one night, despite of being terrified of darkness, I stood outside the house awaiting for my parents' return because it had past the time they promised to be home. I stood for a seemed eternity in darkness....waiting!!

I do very well realize that my fear of darkness was perhaps nothing unique.  Many children are afraid of dark, and most of us not only outgrow that fear but eventually become guardians' of nights so we may protect and give strength to our love ones.

I have learned that nights need not to be dark and that bright spirits could prevail in darkness. As long as my loved ones are by me, shoulder to shoulder, heart to heart, I shall fear no darkness. Because, I am in darkness with you!!

June 7, 2016