您今天笑了嗎?
西方諺語:「笑是靈魂之藥」(Laughter is the soul’s medicine!)
笑一笑,心情好;笑一笑,沒煩惱;笑一笑,病痛少;笑一笑,不易老!
1.
TEACHER: Why are you late?
STUDENT: Class started before I got here.
2.
TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
JOHN: You told me to do it without using tables.
3.
TEACHER: Glenn, how do you spell 'crocodile?'
GLENN: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L'
TEACHER: No, that's wrong
GLENN: Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.
(I Love this child)
4.
TEACHER: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
DONALD: H I J K L M N O.
TEACHER: What are you talking about?
DONALD: Yesterday you said it's H to O.
5.
TEACHER: Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.
WINNIE: Me!
6.
TEACHER: Glen, why do you always get so dirty?
GLEN: Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.
7.
TEACHER: Millie, give me a sentence starting with ' I. '
MILLIE: I is..
TEACHER: No, Millie..... Always say, 'I am.'
MILLIE: All right... 'I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.'
8.
TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted it.
Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn't punish him?
LOUIS: Because George still had the axe in his hand.....
9.
TEACHER: Now, Simon , tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
SIMON: No sir, I don't have to, my Mum is a good cook.
10.
TEACHER: Clyde, your composition on 'My Dog' is exactly the same as your brother's..
Did you copy his?
CLYDE : No, sir. It's the same dog.
(I want to adopt this kid!!!)
11.
TEACHER: Harold, what do you call a person who
keeps on talking when people are no longer interested?
HAROLD: A teacher
12.
TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America.
MARIA: Here it is.
TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America?
CLASS: Maria.
算算看,您笑了幾回?