術後第三十三日,這期間共回診四次,雙眼雷射各一次,每日持續清潔眼睛,消毒眼罩,最後再點上一滴眼藥;這樣的動作一天大概三到四次,睡前則是一劑眼藥膏,不過紅腫現像消退得緩慢,甚至可說時好時壞,我的痛楚與不安感也是時好時壞。所幸一切均朝復原的跡象在緩慢前進,我已經可以同時用雙眼視物,雖然影像仍是局部之模糊與扭曲,但是它的確在進步,雖步伐顯得溫吞未定。
趴臥等待視網膜貼合的期間,幸賴床頭的收音機與書籍相伴,這期間用單眼看了好幾本厚書,用兩耳收聽了不少優質的電台節目、與美妙動人的音樂,尤其是聽到 Don McLean 於六O年代所創作的 ”Vincent” 一曲,原以為雖歷經無數歌手之翻唱後,總未能聽聞超越 Don McLean者,譬如 Nana Mouskouri、Julio Iglesias .. 等人的版本, 就算是加上台灣的齊豫,或是近期的王若琳,總有差強人意之感,不若 Don 之縱橫與深遠,將梵谷的人生意境穿透出意味。此所以西洋經典中之經典,原唱者當仁不讓,有其渾然天成的實力與旨趣。
不過,這樣的局面我想是要改觀了。療養期間不期然聽到一曲純由鋼琴伴奏的女聲版本,直挑原唱詞曲之表現水準,直直令此首唱畫、歌畫、說畫、白描梵谷人生的經典西洋歌曲,有了另番動人的詮釋風貌,且成績絲毫不遜於 Don McLean 的原版,可謂驚喜、驚歎。
尤其是這鋼琴女聲版聽著聽著,腦海裡想的是我家的兩個大小寶貝;阿爹想的是她們,阿爹在病褟上最想將這首歌分享的,還是她們。聽著、想著,眼球除了紅腫,還汨出幾顆水滴,直汨上了衣襟。
遺憾的是,到了現在猶然未知女歌者真實姓名、何許人也,憑添神秘數分,由人去想像。
"Vincent"鋼琴女聲版
Vincent
作詞:Don Mclean
作曲:Don Mclean
Vincent (Vincent van Gogh) 荷蘭畫家文生·梵谷
Starry, starry night繁星點點的夜裡
Paint your palette blue and gray調色盤上只有藍與灰
Look out on a summer's day在夏日裡出外探訪
With eyes that know the darkness in my soul用你那洞悉我靈魂幽暗處的雙眼
Shadows on the hills山丘上的陰影
Sketch the trees and daffodils描繪出樹與水仙花
Catch the breeze and the winter chills捕捉微風與冬天的冷冽
In colors on the snowy linen land用那如雪地裡亞麻般的色彩
Now I understand what you tried to say to me如今我才明白,你想說的是什麼
How you suffered for your sanity當你清醒時你有多麼痛苦
How you tried to set them free你努力的想讓它們得到解脫
They would not listen, they did not know how但他們卻不理會,也不知該如何做
Perhaps, they'll listen now也許,今後他們將會明瞭
Starry, starry night繁星點點的夜裡
Flaming flowers that brightly blaze火紅的花朵燦爛的燃燒著
Swirling clouds in violet haze漩渦似的雲飄在紫羅蘭色的霧裡
Reflect in Vincent's eyes of china blue映照在文生湛藍的眼瞳裡
Colors changing hue色彩變化萬千
Morning fields of amber grain清晨的田園裡琥珀色的農作物
Weathered faces lined in pain佈滿風霜的臉羅列著痛苦
Are soothed beneath the artist's loving hand在藝術家憐愛的手下得到撫慰
Now I understand what you tried to say to me如今我才明白,你想說的是什麼
How you suffered for your sanity當你清醒時你有多麼痛苦
And how you tried to set them free你努力的想讓它們得到解脫
They would not listen, they did not know how但他們卻不理會,也不知該怎麼做
Perhaps, they'll listen now也許,現在他們知道了
For they could not love you因為當初他們無法愛你
But still your love was true但你的愛依然真實
And when no hope was left inside當燦爛的星空裡不存一絲希望
on that starry, starry night當燦爛的星空裡不存一絲希望
You took your life as lovers often do你像許多戀人一樣,結束了自己的生命
But I could have told you, Vincent但願我能告訴你,文生
This world was never meant這個世界根本配不上
for one as beautiful as you一個美好如你的人
Starry, starry night繁星點點的夜裡
Portraits hung in empty hall一幅幅的肖像懸掛在空盪盪的大廳裡
Frameless heads on nameless walls無鑲框的臉倚靠在寂然的牆上
With eyes that watch the world and can't forget配上一雙看遍世事且永不遺忘的雙眼
Like the strangers that you've met就像你曾遇見的陌生人
The ragged man in ragged clothes那些衣衫襤褸的人們
The silver thorn of bloody rose也像血紅的玫瑰上銀色的刺
Lie crushed and broken on the virgin snow斷裂並靜臥在初下的雪上
Now I think I know what you tried to say to me我想我已明白,你想說的是什麼
How you suffered for your sanity當你清醒時你有多麼痛苦
Then how you tried to set them free你努力的想讓它們得到解脫
They would not listen, they're not listening still但他們卻不理會,現在依然如此
Perhaps, they never will...也許,他們永遠不會…
( 歌詞轉自"魔鏡"詞曲網)