The other day someone emailed me an internet joke which is quoted as follows:

"今天，美女同學結婚了！
        想當初高中時，我追了她三年，有一天她給我發了一段英文（If you never abandon，I will in life and death ）給我，找同學翻譯為： 「要不你離開我，要不我和你同歸於盡」嚇了一跳，從此以後我就再沒有聯繫過她。
        直到今天，婚禮現場巨大的銀幕上寫著那段英文（If you never abandon，I will in life and death ）；今天，我才知道那句話是： 你若不離不棄，我必生死相依！
        我再仔細一看，唉~這新郎就是當年給我翻譯的那位同學 ……

TMD…知識改變命運！"

Obviously, the English sentence that high school girl "wrote" is grammatically incorrect.  The transitive verb "abandon" follows by no object, and the main clause has no predicate.  Anyway, how can we make excessive demands on a Chinese HS student?

Well, how about "Leave me not, never; be with you, ever.", my fair young lady?