我丈夫過世後，一位多年老友發送一則訊息給我，他說：「艾崙是與上帝角力的人。他是真正的雅各，也是我會成為基督徒的重要原因。」我從來沒想過將艾崙的掙扎與遠古族長雅各相提並論，但其實這很恰當。他終其一生都在跟自己、跟上帝角力以尋求答案。他愛上帝，卻無法一直緊抓住上帝愛他、饒恕他，並且聽他禱告的事實。然而，他一生都蒙受祝福，也對許多人帶來正向的影響。

雅各一生歷盡艱辛。他用計奪取哥哥以掃的長子名分，逃離家鄉，與他舅舅兼岳父拉班爭鬥多年。後來他逃離拉班，正當他感到孤獨又怕與以掃見面時，有了一番奇遇：「上帝的使者遇見他」（創世記32章1節）。這也許是提醒雅各，先前上帝讓他看見的夢境（28章10-22節）。第32章記載雅各另一次的奇遇：整夜跟一個「人」（上帝成為人的樣式）摔跤。上帝給雅各取名為以色列，因他「與上帝與人較力，都得了勝」（28節）。儘管雅各歷盡艱辛，但上帝一直愛他、與他同在。

我們每個人都會面對困境，但卻不孤獨，在每一個試煉中，上帝都與我們同在。凡信靠上帝的人都蒙祂所愛，蒙祂赦罪，祂還賜給我們永生的應許（約翰福音3章16節）。我們可以緊緊倚靠祂。

A longtime friend sent me a note after my husband’s death: “[Alan] was . . . a grappler with God. He was a real Jacob and a strong reason why I am a Christian today.” I’d never thought to compare Alan’s struggles with the patriarch Jacob’s, but it fit. Throughout his life, Alan struggled with himself and wrestled with God for answers. He loved God but couldn’t always grasp the truths that He loved him, forgave him, and heard his prayers. Yet his life had its blessings, and he positively influenced many.

Jacob’s life was characterized by struggle. He connived to get his brother Esau’s birthright. He fled home and struggled for years with his kinsman and father-in-law, Laban. Then he fled Laban. He was alone and afraid to meet Esau. Yet he’d just had a heavenly encounter: “The angels of God met him” (Genesis 32:1), perhaps a reminder of his earlier dream from God (28:10-22). Now Jacob had another encounter: all night he wrestled with a “man,” God in human form, who renamed him Israel, because he “struggled with God and with humans and [overcame]” (32:28). God was with and loved Jacob despite and through it all.

All of us have struggles. But we’re not alone; God is with us in each trial. Those who believe in Him are loved, forgiven, and promised eternal life (John 3:16). We can hold fast to Him.