Chapter 7: Syntax, Language Errors, and Linguistic Barriers in Modern Poetry
Section 1: Syntax and Syntactic Units
I. Definition of Syntax and Its Units
(1) Definition of Syntax
Organizing units of language into a system to make them a tool for expressing ideas is called "syntax." Syntactic rules primarily refer to: (1) rules of word inflection, and (2) rules for using words to form sentences.
Chinese is an isolating language, lacking word inflections, unlike phonetic Indo-European languages, which can clearly mark parts of speech through phonetic and orthographic changes inherent in the words themselves.
For example:
美: nice, pretty (noun);
美人: beauty (noun);
美麗的: beautiful (adjective);
美麗地: beautifully (adverb).
(2) Syntactic Units
These include morphemes, words, phrases, sentences, and sentence groups—five types in total. Wenxin Diaolong [Chapter on Sentences]: “When a person establishes words, phrases are formed from characters; sentences are accumulated to form sections; sections are accumulated to form chapters.” This fully explains the generative relationships and organizational hierarchy among characters, sentences, sections, and chapters.
- Morphemes
The smallest combination of sound and meaning, also the smallest syntactic unit.
(1) Monosyllabic morphemes: 花 (flower), 蟲 (insect), 鳥 (bird), 魚 (fish), 月 (moon)
(2) Disyllabic morphemes: 葡萄 (grape), 玻璃 (glass), 昆蟲 (insect), 蘿蔔 (radish), 咳嗽 (cough)
(3) Polysyllabic morphemes: 勞力士 (Rolex), 巧克力 (chocolate), 葉綠素 (chlorophyll) - Words
A word is the smallest meaningful and usable unit of language. Being independently usable means it can be said alone or can enter a sentence independently without combining with other specific language components. Its features include:
(1) It has its own meaning.
(2) It can be said alone or answer a question independently.
(3) It is the smallest independently usable language unit.
For example:
詩人 (poet).
Question: What does Xu Zhimo do?
Answer: A poet, also a university teacher.
The meaning of “詩人” cannot be split into “詩” (poem) and “人” (person); similarly, “教師” (teacher) cannot be split into “教” (teach) and “師” (master). Chinese words, unlike phonetic writing systems, do not have obvious inflectional markers for parts of speech, so many syntactic functions must be determined by context.
(3) Classification by Word Structure
- Simple Words:
Composed of a single morpheme. Monosyllabic words are more numerous in pronunciation, e.g., 天 (sky), 人 (person), 你 (you), 我 (I), 高 (tall), 大 (big), 來 (come), 看 (see), 才 (only), 就 (then), 被 (by/passive marker). - Compound Words:
Composed of two or more morphemes, divided into three types:
(1) Reduplication: 奶奶 (grandmother), 微微 (slightly), 蟈蟈兒 (cricket), 亮晶晶 (sparkling), 羞答答 (bashful), 直挺挺 (upright), 傻里傻氣 (silly)
(2) Derivation: 讀者 (reader), 詩人 (poet), 老虎 (tiger), 小豬 (piglet)
(3) Composition: 人民 (people), 聲音 (sound), 友誼 (friendship), 牛皮紙 (kraft paper), 放大鏡 (magnifying glass), 健身房 (gym) - Abbreviated Words:
Formed by condensing a full phrase representing an entity into a few morphemes, then recombining them in the original order. For example: 台大 (National Taiwan University), 中共 (Chinese Communist Party), 四季 (four seasons), 地鐵 (subway), 台鐵 (Taiwan Railway), 台船 (Taiwan Shipbuilding), 農副產品 (agricultural and sideline products). - Phrases (Word Groups):
Words combined according to certain rules to express a specific meaning become phrases, also called word groups. Morphemes are smaller than words; phrases are larger than words. A phrase can further combine with one or more words to form a more complex phrase. For example:
“這裡有直立的炊煙 / 和睡意蒙朧的駝鈴” — Zheng Chouyu, Visitors at Dusk.
“睡意蒙朧” is a supplementary phrase; combined with the word “駝鈴,” it forms a complex phrase. Phrases can be categorized as:
(1) Content Word Phrases
Phrases formed by content words, also called word groups; they are useful units for sentence construction. If a phrase has a head word, its syntactic function in a sentence always aligns with the head. For example: “紅花” aligns with “花” (noun); “高喊” aligns with “喊” (verb). Hence, a phrase centered on a specific word is called a phrase of that word class.
① Noun Phrases
我們班 (our class); 一首詩 (a poem); 長頭髮 (long hair); 可愛的女孩 (cute girl)
Poetry Example:
Plucking Teeth — Luo Fu (excerpt, latter part)
A group of vultures in Ethiopia
From a pile of corpses
Flew up
Perched in rows
On sparse dead trees
Also plucking teeth
With thin ribs one by one
“A group of vultures,” “a pile of corpses,” “thin ribs one by one” are all noun phrases; the first two include numerals, and the third adds adjectives in addition to numerals.
② Verb Phrases
寫完 (finish writing); 請他來 (ask him to come); 看得懂 (can understand); 唱得很好 (sing very well); 認真地學習 (study diligently)
Poetry Example:
Sweet Revenge — Xia Yu
Put some salt on your shadow
Pickle it
Air-dry it
When old
Serve it with wine
“醃起來” (pickle) is a verb phrase expressing the process of an action. Readers may ponder the taste of “pickling the shadow / with wine.”
③ Adjective Phrases
很大 (very big); 暗下來 (darken); 暖和起來 (become warm); 急得不得了 (extremely anxious); 高興得跳了起來 (jumped with joy)
Poetry Example:
What Are They Thinking — Xue Li
Buttons point to the collar
Rainy winter
You never get dry
Collar lifts the sleeves
Doesn’t it also annoy people
You know being a leader is hard, right?
Blame the weather,
Making people forget the hardness of summer, the softness of autumn
At night, I get up to check them
Still quietly leaning against the wall, full of thoughts
“夏天的硬” (hardness of summer) and “秋天的軟” (softness of autumn) are adjective phrases expressing the poet’s contrasting subjective feelings toward the two seasons.
④ Subject-Predicate Phrases
我去 (I go); 頭疼 (headache); 身子單薄 (thin body); 學習努力 (study hard)
“So, I go, always wearing a blue shirt” — Zheng Chouyu, Mistress.
“我去” is a subject-predicate (subject + predicate) phrase.
(2) Content-Function Phrases
Phrases formed by one content word and one function word.
Poetry Example:
Let the Wind Recite — Yang Mu
At that time, you let me write a
Spring poem, written on the chest
The rhythm of heartbeat, the cadence of blood
The image of the breast, the metaphor of a mole
I lay you flat on the warm lake
Let the wind recite (excerpt, final section)
In “the rhythm of heartbeat, the cadence of blood / the image of the breast, the metaphor of a mole,” four content images (heartbeat, blood, breast, mole) combine with four function images (rhythm, cadence, image, metaphor), forming four content-function complementary phrases, displayed sequentially from inside to outside like a collage.
(3) Fixed Phrases
Primarily composed of content words (sometimes including function words) forming fixed combinations, often in four-character forms, also called “four-character idioms.”
Divided into:
① Formed by nouns: 千山萬水 (thousands of mountains and rivers), 山珍海味 (delicacies), 子虛烏有 (nonexistent), 井底之蛙 (frog at the bottom of the well)
② Formed by verbs: 有條有理 (orderly), 指手畫腳 (gesticulating), 左顧右盼 (looking around), 對牛彈琴 (play lute to a cow / talk to the wrong audience)
③ Formed by adjectives: 光明磊落 (open and honest), 華而不實 (glittering but hollow), 洋洋得意 (elated), 輕於鴻毛 (lighter than a feather)
④ Formed by subject-predicate phrases: 心直口快 (frank), 頭破血流 (head broken, blood flowing), 天衣無縫 (flawless), 江郎才盡 (talent exhausted)
4. Sentences
A sentence is a linguistic unit that can express a complete idea, with a certain intonation from beginning to end. A sentence is the smallest unit of language use; when speaking or writing, one generally needs to say a sentence. Sentences can be further divided into:
(1) Subject-Predicate Sentences and Non-Subject-Predicate Sentences
Subject-Predicate Sentences: Sentences composed of a subject and a predicate. They can be further classified according to the type of word that functions as the predicate:
① Verb-Predicate Sentences: Predicate is a verb.
我有一本新詩集。 (I have a new poetry collection.)
你把這本書還給他。 (Please return this book to him.)
我在新竹市工作。 (I work in Hsinchu City.)
你請老馬來一下。 (Please ask Old Ma to come.)
② Adjective-Predicate Sentences: Predicate is an adjective.
今天很悶熱。 (Today is very sultry.)
蘋果快成熟了。 (The apples are almost ripe.)
他急得滿頭大汗。 (He was so anxious that his head was covered with sweat.)
「我達達的馬蹄是美麗的錯誤」 — 鄭愁予, Mistake
(“The clattering of my horse’s hooves is a beautiful mistake.”)
③ Noun-Predicate Sentences: Predicate is a noun.
天天星期七。 (Every day is the seventh day of the week.)
他個子高，大眼睛。 (He is tall with big eyes.)
小王三十來歲。 (Xiao Wang is around thirty years old.)
④ Subject-Predicate Phrase Sentences: Predicate is composed of a subject-predicate phrase.
我頭疼。 (I have a headache.)
他寫習很用心。 (He studies diligently.)
山上紅葉紛飛。 (The red leaves on the mountain fly everywhere.)
(2) Simple Sentences and Complex Sentences
Simple sentences contain only one subject-predicate phrase or predicate.
Complex sentences contain two or more sentences that are semantically connected.
你不去，我也不去。 (If you don’t go, I won’t go either.)
如果明天下雪，我們就去合歡山。 (If it snows tomorrow, we will go to Hehuan Mountain.)
這部電影我在網路上看過，今晚不陪你們去看了。 (I have seen this movie online, so I won’t go watch it with you tonight.)
In a complex sentence, each clause is separate and independent (i.e., one clause is not a component of another clause).
「我期望著，這一天早日到來。」 (“I am hoping that this day will arrive soon.”) This is a simple sentence, not a complex sentence; “這一天早日到來。” (“This day will arrive soon.”) functions as the object of “期望著” (hoping).
5. Sentence Groups
Sentences connected together can form a larger unit, becoming a sentence group or paragraph, and even a full text.
Section 2: Classification of Words and Functions of Sentences
I. Classification of Words
According to syntactic function, words are divided into content words and function words.
(1) Content Words: Can serve as sentence components and carry substantial lexical meaning. They are further divided into:
- Nouns: 水 (water), 月 (moon), 蟲 (insect), 鳥 (bird), 桌子 (table), 國家 (country), 科學 (science), 明天 (tomorrow), 外頭 (outside), 裡邊 (inside)
- Verbs: 走 (walk), 懂 (understand), 喜歡 (like), 是 (be), 醒 (wake), 可以 (can), 應該 (should)
- Adjectives: 紅 (red), 偉大 (great), 胖 (fat), 高興 (happy), 自由 (free), 對的 (correct)
- Numerals: 十 (ten), 百 (hundred), 千 (thousand), 萬 (ten thousand), 億 (hundred million)
- Measure Words: 個 (general classifier), 件 (item), 斤 (catty), 秒 (second), 副 (pair), 次 (time), 遍 (times), 雙 (pair)
- Pronouns: 你 (you), 他們 (they), 每 (each), 這 (this), 那 (that), 怎麼樣 (how/about what)
- Adverbs: 很 (very), 又 (again), 都 (all), 永遠 (forever), 漸漸 (gradually), 親自 (personally)
(2) Function Words: Cannot independently serve as sentence components; they mainly express grammatical meaning, mood, or emotion.
8. Prepositions: 在 (at), 從 (from), 自 (from/by), 向 (toward), 由 (by), 于 (at/in), 給 (give/to)
9. Conjunctions: 和 (and), 與 (with), 因為 (because), 雖然 (although), 因此 (therefore), 即使 (even if)
10. Particles:
(1) Structural Particles: 的, 地, 得, 等, 所
(2) Dynamic Particles: 了, 著, 過, 來著
(3) Modal Particles: 啊, 呢, 吧, 呀, 的, 了, 嗎
11. Onomatopoeia: 砰 (bang), 哞 (moo), 咚咚 (thud), 達達 (clatter), 啁啾 (chirp), 淅瀝 (pitter-patter), 劈哩啪啦 (crackle)
12. Interjections: 唉 (alas), 哼 (hum)
Rhetorical devices related to parts of speech mainly include “category shift” (changing part of speech); those related to word meaning include “pun” (double meaning) and “ambiguity” (polysemy). Among these, beginner creative writers most often misuse the category shift.
II. Functional Classification of Sentences
A sentence is a unit of language as well as a unit of speech. The purpose of speaking is for communication: exchanging ideas and expressing emotions. According to different communicative functions, sentences can be divided into five types: declarative, interrogative, imperative, exclamatory, and responsive sentences. Interrogative, imperative, and responsive sentences usually appear in dialogues.
(1) Declarative Sentences
A declarative sentence is narrative, descriptive, explanatory, or argumentative in nature, providing information to the listener or reader. In non-dialogue contexts, declarative sentences occur most frequently. They can be active or passive, affirmative or negative. The opposite of a declarative sentence is a rhetorical question. Declarative sentences can further be divided into four functional types:
- Narrative Style
Sentences that narrate actions, behaviors, and events in development. Narrative sentences always include a temporal word indicating when an action or event occurs, which differentiates them from descriptive, explanatory, or argumentative styles.
(1) 反正大荒年之後還要談戰爭 — 鄭愁予, Journey
(Anyway, after the Great Famine, we still have to talk about war.)
(2) 宣統那年的風吹著／吹著那串紅玉米 — 瘂弦, Red Corn
(The wind blew that year of Xuantong / blowing that string of red corn.)
(3) 如何讓你遇見我／在我最美麗的時刻 — 席慕蓉, A Blooming Tree
(How to let you meet me / at my most beautiful moment.)
2. Descriptive Style
This style depicts the appearance, shape, and characteristic features of people or objects. It is usually static and does not involve temporality.
(1) 十六歲她的名字便流落在城裡／一種淒然的韻律 — 瘂弦, Kunling
(At sixteen, her name was already scattered throughout the city / a kind of mournful rhythm.)
(2) 他的聲音如雪，冷得沒有甚麼含意／面色如秋扇，摺進去整個夏日的風爆 — 洛夫, Death in the Stone Chamber (Part Six)
(His voice was like snow, cold with almost no meaning / his face like an autumn fan, folding in the entire summer’s windstorm.)
(3) 我吞砂石／我嚼水泥／我大桶大桶的喝水／我是那巨口大腹的／攪拌機 — 向明, Majestic
(I swallow sand and stones / I chew cement / I drink water by the buckets / I am that huge-mouthed, big-bellied / mixer.)
3. Expository Style
This style explains the nature, characteristics, or uses of things. It includes: noun-predicate sentences, “是” (shi) sentences (copular predicate sentences), and sentences using the dynamic particle “過” (guo).
(1) 我要她感覺那是季節或侯鳥的來臨／因我不是常常回家的那種人 — 鄭愁予, Mistress
(I want her to feel that it is the arrival of a season or migratory birds / because I am not the type who often returns home.)
(2) 達達的馬蹄，是美麗的錯誤／我不是歸人，是個過客 — 鄭愁予, Mistake
(The clattering of horse hooves is a beautiful mistake / I am not a returning person, but a passerby.)
(3) 我曾經夫過、父過，也幾乎走到過 — 鄭愁予, Journey
(I have once been a husband, once been a father, and have almost gone everywhere.)
4. Argumentative Style
Also called the demonstrative or discursive style, its function is to explain or argue a viewpoint or opinion. Poems of this type are more intellectual, aiming to persuade readers to accept certain perspectives of the author, serving as the creative motivation.
(1) 黑夜給了我黑色的眼睛／我卻用它尋找光明 — 顧城, Black Eyes
(The dark night gave me black eyes / yet I use them to seek the light.)
(2) 一把鈔票／從前可買／一個笑 一把鈔票／現在可買／不只／一個笑 — 非馬, Inflation
(A handful of bills / used to buy / one smile A handful of bills / now can buy / more than / one smile.)
(3) 打開／鳥籠的／門／讓鳥飛／走 把自由／還給／鳥／籠 — 非馬, Birdcage
(Open / the door / of the birdcage / let the bird fly / return freedom / to / the bird / cage.)
(II) Interrogative Sentences
These raise questions so the other party can obtain information, mainly appearing in dialogues. Typical interrogative sentences neither affirm nor deny anything. They are usually short and syntactically simple.
- 戰爭坐在此哭誰？它的笑聲 曾使七萬個靈魂陷落在比睡眠還深的地帶 — 羅門, Fort McKinley
(Whom does war sit here crying for? Its laughter once caused seventy thousand souls to fall into a realm deeper than sleep.) - 我不知道這是不是我？阿宇／它被書寫在番契上／因為它的出現／我耕種的土地，我童年的記憶／都紙一樣被撕掉了 — 向陽, My Surname
(I don’t know if this is me? Ah Yu / it was written on the deed / because of its appearance / the land I farmed, my childhood memories / were all torn like paper.) - 惟淡泊心情仍常帶一種牽掛，／遠處的島國──／楓葉猶醉否？／清酒猶溫否？／豪情猶存否？／風情猶在否？ — 張錯, Mountain Dwelling
(Yet a tranquil mind still carries a kind of concern, / for the distant island nation — / Are the maple leaves still intoxicated? / Is the sake still warm? / Does heroic spirit still remain? / Does the charm still exist?)
(III) Imperative Sentences
These express requests, commands, exhortations, or prohibitions, frequently appearing in dialogues.
- 而我，多希望我的職業／祇是敲打我懷裡的／小學堂的鐘，／因我已是這種年齡───／啄木鳥立在我臂上的年齡 — 鄭愁予, Beiyanan Tribe
(And I, how I wish my occupation / were only to strike the little school bell in my arms, / because I am already at this age — / the age when a woodpecker perches on my arm.) - 你忘形的停下步來，／彷佛要對誰說──「聽！」／好像全世界所有的秘密，／都應該兩個人來分享。 — 張錯, Incomplete Beauty
(You stop in abandon, / as if to say to someone — “Listen!” / As if all the secrets of the world / should be shared by two people.)
(IV) Exclamatory Sentences
Mainly function to express or convey emotions, showing the speaker’s strong feelings (joy, admiration, anger, sorrow, disgust, surprise, etc.), rather than providing new information. Their structure is generally simple. Common adverbs in exclamatory sentences include: 多, 多麼, 好, 太, 極了.
- 多麼容易說的一句話，／多麼容易感動的一個名詞／甚至可以午夜飲泣和追悔，／可以清晨奔出戶外／面對冰雪融解的初春 — 張錯, Wandering
(How easy it is to say a sentence, / how easily moved is a noun / that one can even weep and regret at midnight, / can run outdoors at dawn / facing the thawing early spring.) - 好沉重一串願望負擔啊！／好漫長一生夢想啊！ — 張錯, Copper Lock Wishes
(What a heavy burden of wishes! / What a long dream of a lifetime!) - 一百歲的時候／我蹲在黯淡的屋角／寫衰弱感傷的信：／「又窮／又不停的發胖／永不消失的／純粹的矛盾啊。」 — 夏宇, Simple Future Tense
(At a hundred years old / I crouch in the dim corner of the house / writing a weak, sentimental letter: / “Poor again / and constantly gaining weight / never-ending / pure contradictions indeed.”)
(V) Responsive Sentences
These are sentences used for greeting someone and responding to greetings, further divided into two categories:
1. Greeting Sentences: Their function is to attract the attention of the interlocutor.
① 卑鄙是卑鄙者的通行證，／高尚是高尚者的墓志銘，／看吧，在那鍍金的天空中，／飄滿了死者彎曲的倒影。 — 北島, Answer
(Meanness is the passport of the mean; / Nobility is the epitaph of the noble; / Look, in that gilded sky, / the twisted reflections of the dead drift everywhere.)
② 啊啊，君不見秋天的樹葉紛紛落下／我雖浪子，也該找找我的家 — 瘂弦, My Soul
(Ah, ah, do you not see the autumn leaves falling one after another? / Though I am a wanderer, I should still search for my home.)
2. Response Sentences: These are reactions to greetings, often beginning with expressions such as “Got it,” “Yes,” “Oh,” “Mm,” etc.
① 是的，明天下午／鞋子勢必還把我們運到這裡 — 瘂弦, Afternoon at the Bar
(Yes, tomorrow afternoon / the shoes will surely carry us here again.)
② 在中國（你問我陰曆是幾號我怎麼知道？）／應該是清明過了在等端午 — 余光中, Drumming Music
(In China (you ask me what day it is in the lunar calendar, how would I know?) / It should be after Qingming, waiting for the Dragon Boat Festival.)
③ 你底眼睛看見這一場火災，／你看不見我，雖然我為你點燃；／唉，那燃燒著的不過是成熟的年代，／你底，我底。我們相隔如重山！ — 穆旦, Eight Poems (No. 1)
(Your eyes saw this fire, / you do not see me, although I lit it for you; / Alas, what is burning is nothing but a mature age, / yours, mine. We are separated as if by heavy mountains!)
Section Three: Word Structural Relations and Basic Sentence Patterns
1. Word Structural Relations
(I) Coordinative Relation
Each element (word group, phrase) in the combination holds equal status.
- 春花與秋葉
(Spring flowers and autumn leaves) - 年輕而漂亮
(Young and beautiful) - 紅的和綠的
(Red and green) - 又團結又鬥爭
(Both united and combative)
Example from poetry:
「我想，寂寥與等待，對婦人是好的」— 鄭愁予, Mistress
(I think that solitude and waiting are good for women.)
Here, “寂寥與等待” (solitude and waiting) forms a coordinated word group, linked by the conjunction “與” (and), establishing a coordinative relation.
(II) Modifier-Head Relation
In a combination, the first element modifies or limits the second element. The first element is called the modifier, and the second is the head.
- 很多
(many) - 不成熟
(immature) - 妹妹的書
(younger sister’s book) - 勤勞地打拼
(working diligently) - 美麗的寶島
(beautiful treasure island) - 極困難的工作著
(extremely difficult work)
Example from poetry:
「反正已還山門 且遲些個進去／且念一些渡 一些飲 一些啄／…」 — 鄭愁予, Buddhist Chant
(Anyway, having returned to the mountain gate, and going in a bit later / and chanting some crossing, some drinking, some pecking / …)
Here, “一些” (some) is a numeral classifier modifying the nouns “渡” (crossing), “飲” (drinking), “啄” (pecking), forming a numeral-modifier-to-head relation.
(III) Verb-Object Relation
In a combination, the first element indicates an action or judgment, and the second element indicates the object of that action or judgment.
- 挖坑
(dig a hole) - 開汽車
(drive a car) - 當老師
(be a teacher) - 去台北
(go to Taipei) - 學美語
(learn English)
(IV) Complement Relation
In a combination, the first element expresses an action or state, and the second element mainly indicates the result or extent of that action or state. The first element is the predicate verb or adjective; the second is the complement.
- 去一下。
(Go for a moment.) - 聽清楚。
(Listen clearly.) - 住幾天。
(Stay a few days.) - 走向光明。
(Walk toward the light.) - 乾淨得很。
(Extremely clean.) - 氣得說不出話來。
(So angry that one cannot speak.)
(V) Subject-Predicate Relation
In a combination, the first element represents the agent or describer (subject), and the second element provides narrative or descriptive explanation (predicate).
- 你看。
(You see.) - 頭疼。
(Headache.) - 房子大。
(The house is big.) - 世界和平。
(World peace.) - 小張看電視。
(Xiao Zhang watches TV.) - 小玉是女模。
(Xiao Yu is a female model.)
2. Sentence Structural Classification
(I) Subject-Predicate Sentences and Non-Subject-Predicate Sentences
1. Subject-Predicate Sentences
Sentences composed of a subject and predicate, further classified by the nature of the predicate:
(1) Verb-Predicate Sentences: Predicate is a verb
① 小馬在工廠工作。
(Xiao Ma works in a factory.)
② 我有一本新畫報。
(I have a new pictorial.)
③ 你把這本書還給她。
(You return this book to her.)
④ 姐姐是大二學生。
(My elder sister is a second-year university student.)
⑤ 你請老王來一下。
(Please ask Lao Wang to come for a moment.)
⑥ 我下午去淡水站接朋友。
(I will go to Tamsui Station in the afternoon to pick up a friend.)
(2) Adjective-Predicate Sentences: Predicate is an adjective
① 今天很熱。
(It is very hot today.)
② 蘋果快熟了。
(The apples are ripening soon.)
③ 他急得滿頭大汗。
(He is so anxious that his head is covered in sweat.)
(3) Subject-Predicate Phrase Sentences: Predicate is a subject-predicate phrase
① 我頭疼。
(I have a headache.)
② 他學習很努力。
(He studies very hard.)
③ 山上國旗飄揚。
(The national flag flutters on the mountain.)
(4) Noun-Predicate Sentences: Predicate is a noun or noun phrase
① 今天星期一。
(Today is Monday.)
② 他高個子，大眼睛。
(He is tall with big eyes.)
③ 阿里伊拉克人。
(Ali is Iraqi.)
④ 小劉二十多歲。
(Xiao Liu is in his twenties.)
2. Non-Subject-Predicate Sentences
Sentences not composed of subject and predicate, also called “single-part sentences.” Non-subject-predicate sentences do not omit a subject or predicate, nor can a definite subject or predicate be added. They are complete sentences, not ellipses. Divided into:
(1) Subjectless Sentences: Sentences without a subject, also called “verb sentences.”
① 注意！
(Attention!)
② 小心火車。
(Watch out for the train.)
③ 下雨了。
(It is raining.)
(2) Monologue Sentences: Sentences composed of a single word or noun phrase, also called “single-word sentences.”
① Noun sentences:
(Good and lovely child. How beautiful the flowers are!)
② Adjective sentences:
(So cold!)
③ Interjection sentences:
(Alas!)
(II) Simple Sentences and Compound Sentences
1. Simple Sentence:
A simple sentence contains only one subject-predicate phrase (or predicate). Both the subject-predicate sentences and non-subject-predicate sentences mentioned above are simple sentences.
2. Compound Sentence:
A compound sentence is composed of two or more simple sentences that are semantically connected. Each simple sentence in a compound sentence is called a clause. Between clauses, there is usually a certain pause in pronunciation. A clause in a compound sentence cannot be a component of another clause.
① 你不去，我也不去。
(If you don’t go, I won’t go either.)
② 如果明天不下雨，我們就去貓空。
(If it doesn’t rain tomorrow, we will go to Maokong.)
③ 這電影我看過，今天晚上不去看了。
(I have already seen this movie, so I won’t watch it tonight.)
The following sentences are simple sentences, not compound sentences (863):
① 培養兒童有健康的體魄，是我們的一個重要目標。
(Cultivating children with healthy physiques is one of our important goals.)
Here, “培養兒童有健康的體魄” (cultivating children with healthy physiques) is the subject of this simple sentence.
② 我們都知道，他工作積極，學習努力。
(We all know that he works actively and studies diligently.)
Here, “他工作積極，學習努力” (he works actively and studies diligently) is the object of the verb “知道” (know).
3. Types of Compound Sentences
Compound sentences are divided into coordinative compound sentences, modifier-head compound sentences, and multiple compound sentences. In free-verse poetry, compound sentences are frequently used, often with closely connected preceding and following contexts.
(I) Coordinative Compound Sentence
In a coordinative compound sentence, the clauses are grammatically equal and do not modify or explain each other. They can be further divided into:
1. Parallel Compound Sentence
The meaning relations among the clauses in parallel compound sentences are complex and diverse, mainly in three types:
(1) Enumerative Relation
The clauses separately narrate or describe several related matters, situations, or aspects of the same thing. The clauses generally do not distinguish primary and secondary order and may not use conjunctions.
Common conjunctions:
“也” (also), “又” (again), “同時” (at the same time), “又……，又……” (both..., and...), “一面……，一面……” (on one hand..., on the other hand...), “一邊……，一邊……” (while..., also...)
Examples:
① 莫小姐的溫順中透露出善良，吳小姐的溫順中表現出世故。
(Miss Mo’s gentleness reveals kindness, while Miss Wu’s gentleness shows worldliness.)
② 幾個大嬸一邊喝咖啡，一邊聊是非。
(Several women drank coffee while chatting about gossip.)
③ 我們每天複習生詞，寫單字，作練習。
(We review vocabulary, write words, and do exercises every day.)
④ 這是新書，那也是新書。
(This is a new book, and that is also a new book.)
⑤ 他又會日語，又會英語。
(He can speak both Japanese and English.)
(2) Contrast Relation
Generally consists of two clauses, which contrast or highlight each other semantically. Except that the second clause can start with the conjunction “而” (while), other conjunctions are generally not used.
Common conjunctions: …，而… (..., while...)
Examples:
① 朱門酒肉臭，路有凍死骨。
(In the noble households, wine and meat rot; on the road lie frozen corpses.)
② 張老師教三班，李老師教四班。
(Teacher Zhang teaches Class Three, while Teacher Li teaches Class Four.)
③ 上阿里山的人越來越多，阿里山上的櫻花越開越艷。
(More and more people go to Alishan, and the cherry blossoms there bloom more brilliantly.)
④ 河東，是個砲彈殼鐘；橋南，是個鋼軌鐘。
(Hedong is a cannon-shell clock; Qiaonan is a railroad-track clock.)
⑤ 在修建阿里山鐵路的日日夜夜裡，困難一個接著一個出現，而克服的喜悅也一個接著一個傳來。
(During the days and nights of building the Alishan Railway, difficulties emerged one after another, while the joy of overcoming them also arrived one after another.)
(3) General-to-Detail / Detail-to-General Relation
Two types:
A. First general, then detail
B. First detail, then general
The general part and the detailed parts are in coordinative relation.
A. First general, then detail
① 來客也不少，有送行的，有拿東西的，有送行兼拿東西的。
(There were also quite a few visitors: some came to see people off, some brought things, and some did both.)
② 我一天無事可做，這樣活久了也就沒有趣味，活的太久了，反而惹人討厭。
(I had nothing to do all day; living so long became uninteresting, and living too long even made people dislike me.)
Poetry example:
Sea-bloom Tattoo / 余光中 (Yu Guangzhong)
一向忘了左胸口有一小塊傷痕／為什麼會在那裡，是刀／挑的，還是劍／削的，還是誰溫柔的唇／不溫柔的阻咒所吻?
(I had always forgotten a small scar on my left chest / Why is it there? Was it stabbed by a knife, / or cut by a sword, / or kissed by someone’s gentle lips / with an ungentle curse?)
B. First detail, then general
③ 或者喝茶，或者喝咖啡，我隨意都可。
(Either drink tea or drink coffee, I don’t mind either.)
④ 有時天光，有時月圓，總不會一直好運氣。
(Sometimes the sky is bright, sometimes the moon is full; good luck never lasts continuously.)
Poetry examples:
a. Prodigal Returns / 余光中
布穀鳥啼，兩岸是一樣的咕咕／木棉花開，兩岸是一樣的豔豔／一切仍依照神農的曆書
(The cuckoo cries; the banks echo the same “coo coo.” / The kapok blooms; the banks echo the same brilliance. / Everything still follows Shennong’s calendar.)
b. To the End of the River / 周夢蝶 (Zhou Mengdie)
行到水窮處／不見窮，不見水——／卻有一片幽香／冷冷在目，在耳，在衣。
(Walking to where the river ends / No end is seen, no water is seen— / Yet a faint fragrance lingers / Coldly in sight, in ear, on clothes.)
c. A Bucket of Nails / 向明 (Xiang Ming)
都很尖銳／都有短長／都很挺直／都赤條條的像根陽具／隨時準備挺進侵入一處軟弱的地方
(All are sharp / all vary in length / all are straight / all naked like a phallus / ready at any moment to pierce a weak spot.)
(II) Modifier-Head (Dependent-Independent) Compound Sentences
A compound sentence with two clauses, in which one clause serves as the main clause (head, 正) and the other as the subordinate clause (modifier, 偏), is called a modifier-head (dependent-independent) compound sentence. The subordinate clause functions to modify or restrict the main clause. The clause that is modified or restricted is the main clause (head clause, 正句), and the other clause is the subordinate clause (modifier clause, 偏句).
1. Cause-and-Effect Compound Sentences
The subordinate clause indicates the cause, and the main clause indicates the effect. There are two types: explanatory cause-and-effect sentences and inferential cause-and-effect sentences.
(1) Explanatory Cause-and-Effect Sentences
The subordinate clause explains the reason, and the main clause explains the result produced by this reason.
Common conjunctions:
“因為……，所以……“ (because..., therefore...), “由於” (due to), “因而” (thus), “因此” (therefore), “以致” (so that), “以致於” (so that / resulting in), etc.
- “因為……，所以……” is often used in pairs.
- “由於” is often used alone.
- “以致於” is usually used for negative consequences.
Examples:
① 由於準備充分，因而會議進行得很順利。
(Due to adequate preparation, the meeting proceeded very smoothly.)
② 因為有颱風預報，所以我們沒去阿里山。
(Because there was a typhoon forecast, we didn’t go to Alishan.)
③ 由於他優柔寡斷，以致於錯失良機。
(Because he was indecisive, he missed a good opportunity.)
④ 這些年輕教師往往顧不得考慮教學法，以致教學效果不理想。
(These young teachers often neglect to consider teaching methods, resulting in unsatisfactory teaching outcomes.)
(2) Inferential Cause-and-Effect Sentences
The subordinate clause presents a premise that is already realized or confirmed, and the main clause states the inference drawn from it.
Common conjunctions: “既然……，就（也、還）……” (since..., then (also / still)...)
Examples:
① 既然他不願意，就不要勉強了。
(Since he is unwilling, don’t force him.)
② 你既然想參賽，就趕緊報名吧。
(Since you want to participate, hurry up and register.)
③ 既然他都承認作錯了，大家就原諒他吧。
(Since he has admitted his mistake, everyone should forgive him.)
④ 學生：老師，我頭疼發燒。
老師：既然你身體不舒服，就早些回家休息吧。
(Student: Teacher, I have a headache and fever.
Teacher: Since you are not feeling well, go home early to rest.)
⑤ 既然他們能做到，我們為什麼做不到呢？
(Since they can do it, why can’t we?)
Poetry example:
On a Street in China / 瘂弦 (Ya Xian)
既然有煤氣燈，霓虹燈／我們的老太陽便不再借給我們使用
(Since there are gas lamps and neon lights, our old sun is no longer lent for our use.) (excerpt)
2. Adversative (Contrast) Compound Sentences
The subordinate clause narrates a fact, but the main clause does not follow this fact to a logical conclusion; instead, it states an opposite or partially opposite fact. The meaning of the subordinate clause contrasts or opposes the main clause, forming a clear turn or contrast, not a natural sequential flow.
(1) Strong Contrast
Common conjunctions: “雖然……，但是（可是）……“ (although..., but...), “否則” (otherwise), “不然” (or else), “然而” (however), etc.
Examples:
① 雖然積雪還覆蓋著山峰，山下的原野卻換上了春裝。
(Although snow still covers the mountain peaks, the plains at the foot of the mountain have donned spring attire.)
② 幸而司機及時踩剎車，否則整部公車就墜落懸崖了。
(Fortunately the driver applied the brakes in time; otherwise, the whole bus would have fallen off the cliff.)
③ 他在地震中失去雙腿，然而他殘而不廢，裝上義肢後繼續工作。
(He lost both legs in the earthquake, yet he did not waste away; after fitting prosthetic legs, he continued to work.)
Poetry example:
Maple Imprint / 張錯 (Zhang Cuo)
雖然我是如何珍惜每一刻的過往，／如何期盼每一刻的將來，／可是現在羞赧的你，／卻掙扎不安於／如何反悔一個承諾。
(Although I cherish every moment of the past / and look forward to every moment of the future, / now, you, embarrassed, / struggle uneasily / over how to break a promise.)
(2) Mild Contrast
Common conjunctions: “不過” (however), “卻” (yet), “只是” (just), “就是” (simply), etc.
Examples:
① 他脾氣是不太好，不過心地倒善良。
(His temper isn’t very good, but his heart is kind.)
② 中國人經濟生活明顯改善了，就是缺乏民主和自由。
(The economic life of Chinese people has clearly improved, but there is still a lack of democracy and freedom.)
③ 你的確很聰明機伶，只是脾氣可以再平和些。
(You are indeed smart and clever, but your temper could be a bit calmer.)
Poetry example:
Chess Piece / 向明 (Xiang Ming)
一枚棋子就一枚棋子吧／挪來擺去的／也不過為的是／扳回／一盤頹局
(Let a chess piece be just a chess piece / moved back and forth / only for the sake of / turning around / a lost game.) (excerpt)
3. Conditional Compound Sentences
The subordinate clause sets a condition, and the main clause states the result. There are three types:
(1) Specific Condition Sentences
The main clause expresses the result, and the subordinate clause specifies the condition required to achieve that result.
Common conjunctions:
- “只要……，就……” (as long as..., then...) — denotes a sufficient condition. A implies B; lack of A does not necessarily negate B.
Examples:
① 只要你肯努力，就能學好英文。
(As long as you are willing to work hard, you can learn English well.)
② 只要兩個角是對頂角，它們就必然相等。
(As long as two angles are vertical angles, they must be equal.)
③ 只要大家願意，隨時都可以來做客。
(As long as everyone is willing, they can come to visit at any time.)
- Another form: “只有……，才……“ (only if..., then...) or “除非……，不然……“ (unless..., otherwise...) — denotes a necessary condition. A is necessary for B; without A, B cannot happen.
Examples:
① 只有用這種藥，才能治好你的病。
(Only by using this medicine can your illness be cured.)
② 除非你親自去請，他才會來。
(Unless you personally invite him, he won’t come.)
③ 除非你也去，不然我就不去。
(Unless you go as well, I won’t go.)
(2) Unconditional Sentences
The subordinate clause indicates that regardless of any condition, the main clause’s result occurs.
Common conjunctions: “不管（不論、無論）……，都（也、總、還）……” (no matter..., still...)
Examples:
① 不管誰來說情，他都不給面子。
(No matter who comes to plead, he gives no face.)
② 無論困難有多大，我們都能克服。
(No matter how difficult it is, we can overcome it.)
③ 不論誰參加地震救災行動，災民們都會感激。
(Regardless of who participates in the earthquake relief, the victims will be grateful.)
(3) Hypothetical Conditional Sentences
The subordinate clause sets a hypothetical condition, and the main clause states the result under that condition.
Common conjunctions:
- Spoken: “要（是）……，（就）……“ (if..., then...), “如果……，（就）……“ (if..., then...)
- Written: “假如、假使、假若、倘若、倘使、若是、如、設若……” (if…)
The main clause commonly uses: “那麼、那、就、便、則” (then, would, etc.)
Examples:
① 要是你喜歡，你就拿去吧。
(If you like it, then take it.)
② 如果有什麼事情，就給我打電話。
(If anything happens, then call me.)
③ 倘若你背叛了共產黨，組織是會無情地懲罰你的。
(If you betray the Communist Party, the organization will punish you mercilessly.)
Poetry example:
Camphor Oil Lamp / 余光中 (Yu Guangzhong)
如果我一路走回去／回到流浪的起點／就會在古屋的窗外／窺見那夜讀的小孩／吟哦韓愈或李白／在未有電視的年代
(If I walk all the way back / to the starting point of my wandering / I will glimpse outside the window of the old house / the child reading that night / chanting Han Yu or Li Bai / in the era before television.) (excerpt)
- Another form: “如果（說）……（的話），那麼……“ (if it is said that..., then...) — indicates a factual or judgmental relation, not a condition.
Examples:
① 如果說當年他還顯得有些幼稚的話，那麼，他現在已經成熟多了。
(If he seemed somewhat childish back then, then now he has matured much.)
② 如果你年輕時多讀些書，那麼你現在就不會後悔了。
(If you had read more books in your youth, then you wouldn’t regret it now.)
Poetry example:
Sky Lantern / 向明 (Xiang Ming)
如果那上面已是黑暗／一切發光體都己滅絕／黑社會己經成型／那裡會夠用僅發微光的螢火蟲
(If it is already dark up there / all luminous bodies have been extinguished / the underworld has already formed / there will be just enough fireflies emitting faint light.) (excerpt)
- Hypothetical condition sentences may describe already-realized situations or not-yet-realized situations, with the latter being more common.
Examples:
① 如果你早來兩天，就能看見老李了。
(If you had come two days earlier, you could have seen Old Li.)
→ This refers to a past fact; the hypothetical condition is impossible to realize.
② 你要是早點來，還能看見老李。
(If you come earlier, you can still see Old Li.)
→ This refers to something not yet realized; the hypothetical condition is possible to realize.
4. Concessive Compound Sentences
The subordinate clause acknowledges a fact and makes a concession, while the main clause expresses a positive meaning from the opposite perspective.
Common conjunctions:
- Subordinate clause: “儘管、縱然、即使、哪怕、就是” (although, even if, even though, no matter, even...)
- Main clause: “也、都” (still, yet)
Two types:
(1) Factual Concession — the subordinate clause describes a fact that has already occurred.
Examples:
① 她儘管身體不太好，可是仍然堅持工作。
(Although her health is not very good, she still insists on working.)
② 這事固然是他不對，可你也不能得理不讓人哪。
(Indeed he is wrong in this matter, but you cannot take advantage of your position and refuse others.)
Poetry example:
The Water Will Commit Suicide for You to See / 向明 (Xiang Ming)
縱百般柔弱／千般溫順／總不免令人比擬成／可以捧喝滌盪揩抹搓揉／濕淋淋的／一介弱女子
(Though a hundred kinds of softness / and a thousand kinds of gentleness / inevitably lead one to compare it / to a drenched / delicate woman / who can be held, drunk, washed, wiped, or rubbed.)
(2) Hypothetical Concession — the subordinate clause describes a hypothetical fact.
Examples:
① 即使颳風下雨，比賽也照常進行。
(Even if it is windy and rainy, the game will proceed as scheduled.)
② 哪怕困難再多，我們也要按時完成任務。
(No matter how many difficulties there are, we must complete the task on time.)
③ 縱然走遍天涯海角，也難找到這樣的知音。
(Even if one travels to the ends of the earth, it is difficult to find such a soulmate.)
④ 就算有天大的困難，我們也要如期完工通車。
(Even if there are enormous difficulties, we must complete the project and open the road on schedule.)
Poetry example:
Love Story / 北島 (Bei Dao)
即使在約會的小路上／也會有仇人的目光相遇時／降落的冰霜
(Even on the little path of a date / there will be the gaze of enemies upon meeting / and frost will descend.) (excerpt)
5. Choice Complex Sentences
Two clauses each express two possible alternative situations, while simultaneously clearly selecting one of them.
Common connecting phrases:
“與其……，不如……” (rather than… it is better to…) ; “與其……，寧肯（毋寧、寧願、寧可）……” (rather than… one would rather…) indicate first discarding, then choosing, showing the intention of taking (the better) and discarding (the worse) when comparing the merits of two approaches.
- Example sentences:
① Rather than sitting and waiting to die, it is better to rise and resist.
② Regarding work, rather than taking the easier route, one would rather take the more difficult path.
③ I originally wanted him to stay a few more days; rather than saying it allowed him some enjoyment, it is better said that it gave me some comfort.
“寧可（寧肯、寧願）……，也不（不、不願）……”, “寧……，不……” generally express first taking, then discarding, with a clear attitude and decisive tone.
④ One would rather eat a single fresh peach than a whole basket of rotten apricots.
⑤ One would rather arrive early at the exam venue than rush at the last minute.
⑥ The rebel army would rather die in battle than ever retreat.
6. Purpose Complex Sentences
The subordinate clause indicates the purpose, while the main clause explains the action taken to achieve this purpose.
Common connecting phrases: “為” (for), “為了” (in order to).
- Example sentences:
① In order to improve employee work efficiency, the company raises employees’ salaries and various benefits year by year.
② In order to win medals at the Olympic Games, he trains hard in weightlifting every day.
The main clause can also use phrases such as “以免” (so as to avoid), “以便” (so that), “免得” (lest), “省得” (to avoid).
① Prepare the materials in advance so that we can discuss them in the meeting.
② Eat more, so that you won’t be hungry later.
③ He recently reduced his online hours to avoid affecting his final exams.
7. Temporal Complex Sentences
The subordinate clause indicates the time, and the main clause describes what happens or occurs during that time. Temporal complex sentences generally do not require connecting words, though the main clause can optionally use “就” (then), “還” (still), “才” (only then).
① Not even twenty li had been walked before the weather changed.
② After working on the mountain for half a day, dawn had just broken.
③ When the sun rose to a person’s height, why are you still not awake?
Poetic examples:
〈夜歌〉/ 鄭愁予
At this moment, our harbor has truly quieted. When wind and lamps,
When slight sorrow and past events are like a small tide,
You must walk quietly past, just as I walk quietly,
Past the fourteenth pier with a beautiful curve. (excerpt)
〈天葬的哀歌〉/ 向明
Next spring, by the roadside you passed,
There may bloom a flower more beautiful than morning dew,
Full and plentifully opening. (excerpt)
8. Chain Complex Sentences
The subordinate and main clauses are closely connected, often with repeated connecting words appearing in the clauses.
Common connecting words:
“越……，越……” (the more… the more…); “誰……，……誰” (whoever… then…); “哪裡……，……哪裡” (wherever… there…); “怎麼……，怎麼……” (however… then…).
Example sentences:
① Whoever littered without public morality, I report them, so they receive a fine.
② Wherever there is an accident, the rescue team appears there.
③ The longer the mask is applied, the more obvious the whitening effect.
④ I say it one way, you do it that way.
Poetic example:
〈雛舞孃〉/ 向明
Take it off!
Only then did she remember,
It was just the one onion her dad didn’t sell in the field,
The more she peels,
The whiter,
The whiter,
The more tender. (excerpt)
9. Supplemental Explanation Complex Sentences
For a specific scope, two clauses supplement each other in meaning, or use a question-answer format to express complete meaning, called supplemental complex sentences. Such sentences often divide a specific range of things into two images, presented regularly, and mutually complement each other.
In subordinate-main complex sentences, generally the subordinate clause comes first, followed by the main clause. Some subordinate-main complex sentences may have the main clause first and the subordinate clause second; the subordinate clause in this position must use a connecting word. This type of complex sentence carries a supplemental explanation meaning and sometimes emphasizes the subordinate clause.
Common connecting words: “…，雖然…”, “…，因為…”, “…，哪怕…”, “…，即使…”, “…，只要…”.
Example sentences:
① We must hold our positions and continue fighting, even if we fight to the last person.
② The work progress for this month can be completed early, as long as everyone puts in a little extra effort.
③ Grandma Zhu Yunu, who sells ten-yuan lunchboxes, is great, although she does not have the financial resources as abundant as Tzu Chi.
(III) Multiple Complex Sentences
Some complex sentences consist of three or more clauses, with two or more hierarchical levels; these are called multiple complex sentences.
Example:
Taking good classroom notes not only helps us fully grasp and deeply understand the teacher’s lecture content, but also accumulates rich study materials for the future, so it is very important.
(“不僅……而且……”: progressive complex sentence; “所以……”: causal complex sentence)
Section Four: Syntactic Features of Modern Poetry
1. Appropriate Use of Rhetorical Figures
Poet Lo Fu once said: “Poets are magicians of language,” indicating that modern poets, like magicians, use magical transformations to create novel language. In every era, poets play the leading role in innovating language, exhausting all efforts to reform syntax, forge new vocabulary, and promote language renewal and evolution.
Examples:
- Zheng Chouyu: “Beautiful Mistake” is a paradoxical phrase.
- Lo Fu: “火來，我在灰燼中等你” (“Fire comes, I wait for you in the ashes”); Yu Guangzhong: “酒入豪腸／七分釀成了月光／剩下的三分嘯成劍氣／繡口一吐就半個盛唐” — both are surreal exaggerations.
- Lo Fu: “一揮鞭／蹄聲便成為永不回頭的山色” transforms sound into visual imagery, moving from auditory to visual perception; “晚鐘／是遊客下山的小路／羊齒植物／沿著白色的石階／一路嚼了下去”, the first two lines transform sound into form (auditory to visual), the last three lines move from visual to taste (chewing) and from static to dynamic — these are synesthetic expressions.
- Yu Guangzhong: “那就折一張闊些的荷葉／包一片月光回去／回去夾在唐詩裡／扁扁的／像壓過的相思” — a dreamlike, imaginative metaphor.
- Bai Ling: “只有炮火蒸餾過的酒／特別清醒／每一滴都會讓你的舌尖／舔到刺刀” — the tongue touches the bayonet, which has not only a visual image but also a tactile sharpness, engaging sight and touch in a lively, creative sensory depiction.
From these examples, readers should notice that these meaningful, thought-provoking lines share a common feature: the use of certain rhetorical figures. Appropriately using rhetorical devices indeed enlivens imagery, enriches and deepens meaning, enhances creative appeal, and directly improves readability.
Modern poets, by painstakingly creating new vocabulary and imagery, embody Du Fu’s dictum: “語不驚人死不休” (“If the words do not astonish, I will not stop”), showing a passionate obsession with creation. This not only broadens contemporary aesthetic vision but also enriches and deepens modern poetry’s aesthetic content.
II. The Influence of Westernized Syntax
Some modern poets, through the process of reading European and American modern poetry, absorbed the syntax of Western poetry, resulting in a large number of “inverted sentences,” “inserted clauses,” “run-on lines,” and “rap-like expressions.” Poet Yu Guangzhong holds a relatively positive view of “Europeanized syntax,” pointing out that “the habit of inserting clauses and the more lively inverted sentences can make Chinese characters more vivid.” For example:
1. Inverted Sentences
① Zheng Chouyu: “那美麗的鄉愁，伸手可觸及” (“That beautiful nostalgia, within reach of a hand”), “趁月色，我傳下悲戚的「將軍令」自琴弦……” (“Taking advantage of the moonlight, I passed down the sorrowful ‘General’s Order’ from the strings…”).
The original sentences are: “伸手可觸及／那美麗的鄉愁” (“Within reach of a hand / that beautiful nostalgia”), “趁月色，自琴弦我傳下悲戚的「將軍令」……” (“Taking advantage of the moonlight, from the strings I passed down the sorrowful ‘General’s Order’…”).
② Yu Guangzhong: “更冷酷的季節，受你感召／有梅花千樹競發對冰雪／你身後，餘音嫋嫋更不絕” (“In the colder season, inspired by you / a thousand plum trees compete to bloom against ice and snow / behind you, the lingering sound drifts endlessly”). The original clause “對冰雪競發” (“blooming against ice and snow”) was inverted to “競發對冰雪” in order to rhyme with the “ㄝ” sound in the following line “餘音嫋嫋更不絕.” This inversion was done deliberately for the sake of rhyming.
③ Lo Fu: “突然從地層深處響起／一陣嘩嘩的掌聲／當我雙手捧起一把落葉／至於結論／無人知曉除了秋風…” (“Suddenly from the depths of the strata arose / a burst of clapping / when I held a handful of fallen leaves in my hands / as for the conclusion / no one knew except the autumn wind…”). This passage contains two inverted expressions. The normal word order should be: “當我雙手捧起一把落葉／一陣嘩嘩的掌聲／突然從地層深處響起／除了秋風，無人知曉結論” (“When I held a handful of fallen leaves in my hands / a burst of clapping / suddenly arose from the depths of the strata / no one knew the conclusion except the autumn wind”).
2. Inserted Clauses (Episode)
Inserted clauses serve several purposes: (1) to clarify an ambiguous word, (2) to indicate a missing word or phrase, and (3) to set the context and create a sense of presence. They bear the functions of supplementing meaning, establishing context, and expressing poetic sentiment. For example:
① Ya Xian: “小小的髮兒啊清朝人為他心碎／是玉堂春吧／〈夜夜滿園子嗑瓜子兒的臉！〉／『苦啊……』” (“Little hair, ah, Qing dynasty people are heartbroken for him / it must be Yu Tang Chun / 〈Faces cracking sunflower seeds in the garden every night!〉 / ‘Bitter…’”). The bracketed insertion in the line merely supplements the preceding text; it does not step outside the poem to make truth claims or moral judgments on the theme, story, or paragraph. It is purely a “narrator-style” insertion, functioning to supplement meaning.
② Lo Fu: “從昨夜開始／雪自言自語而來，荒謬如我／虛無亦如／我（時鐘不停地在消滅自己）／落雪了……” (“Since last night / the snow comes murmuring, absurd as I am / equally void as / I (the clock keeps destroying itself) / snow has fallen…”). The parenthetical clause “(the clock keeps destroying itself)” emerges from the original image and, like a montage, introduces a separate visual layer.
③ Qiu Huan: “買花的日子來了／我柔順地買了花／插在／一對眼睛裡／(省略)／(對不起)／(拜託再讀下去)／買海水的日子來了／我柔順地買了海水／（實在對不起）” (“The day to buy flowers has come / I obediently bought flowers / placed in / a pair of eyes / (omission) / (sorry) / (please continue reading) / the day to buy seawater has come / I obediently bought seawater / (really sorry)”).
The last three bracketed lines contain “subversive text,” which is “meta-language,” providing interpretation and evaluation of the preceding three lines of “object-language.” This differs from the narrator-style insertion, which merely extends the object-language without stepping outside it to provide new interpretation or evaluation.
3. Run-On Lines (Cross-Line Sentences)
A run-on line occurs when a sentence continues onto the next line before it is complete.
Yu Guangzhong: “至少我已經不能夠，我的白髮／縱有三千丈怎跟你比長？” (“At least I can no longer, my white hair / even if it were three thousand zhang, how could it compare with yours?”). Without the run-on, the original order should be: “至少我已經不能夠／我的白髮縱有三千丈怎跟你比長？”
Yu Guangzhong: “一向忘了左胸口有一小塊傷痕／為什麼會在那裡，是刀／挑的，還是劍／削的，還是誰溫柔的唇／不溫柔的詛咒所吻？” (“I have always forgotten a small scar on my left chest / why is it there, is it stabbed by a knife, or cut by a sword, or kissed by someone’s gentle lips / with an unkind curse?”). The original order should be: “一向忘了左胸口有一小塊傷痕／為什麼會在那裡／是刀挑的／還是劍削的／還是誰溫柔的唇／不溫柔的詛咒所吻？”
Dongcheng Jushi points out: “English poetry, in order to rhyme (English rhymes include alliteration, end-rhymes, internal rhymes), will deliberately attach a sentence to the previous line, then break the second line to rhyme with a word in the second line.” “In Chinese modern poetry, although the concept of run-on lines is introduced, it does not necessarily have to match a rhyme. It is almost arbitrary; poets run-on whenever they like. First, modern Chinese poetry is generally unrhymed. Second, run-on lines create a seemingly broken but continuous rhythm, which is usually what the poet aims for.”
Additionally, there is another type of cross-line that occurs between paragraphs, functioning like an invisible “semantic ligament” connecting paragraphs. Most poems follow causal relationships when crossing from one paragraph to another, ensuring semantic continuity. However, sometimes, after a line runs on, due to the combination of images before and after, multiple “semantic” relationships arise, which can cause reading ambiguity: “semantic divergence.” This divergence usually comes from “syntactic” relationships, as shown in the following poetic example:
“Let the Wind Recite” / Yang Mu (excerpt)
If I could write for you
a summer poem, when the reeds
proliferate violently, sunlight
flies to waist height, and toward
the place where
both feet stand apart
flows horizontally. When a new drum
breaks, if I could
write for you an autumn poem
swaying on a small boat
soaking twelve measures,
when sorrow curls along the riverbed
like a yellow dragon, leaving
the raging mountain flood
to rise and splash from injured eyes,
if I could write for you
a winter poem,
as if finally to witness ice and snow,
to bear witness to the shrunken lake,
witness someone visiting at midnight,
awakening a bed of hasty dreams,
bringing you to distant provinces,
giving you a lantern, asking you
to sit quietly there waiting,
and forbidding you to shed tears.
In each stanza, the final line “if I could write for you” semantically links to the opening line of the next stanza. Through these run-on lines, a “seemingly broken but actually continuous” chain of meaning is formed. Such syntax can also create harmonized end-rhyme lines and strengthen the rhythm of the poem, serving as a valuable syntactic form to emulate.
4. Rap-like Lines
Rap-like lines refer to lines in which certain words and phrases are repeatedly used, forming a structure similar to a “palindrome” or “stacked repetition.” Semantically, the meaning is repeatedly reinforced; rhythmically, it loops and spirals continuously, becoming bloated, protracted, and verbose. If these repeated phrases were deleted, the number of lines in the poem would decrease, the quality would appear thin, and the meaning would seem shallow. Put plainly: rap-like lines are the “over-inflation” of poetic lines. The poem Bing Bu (“Not Really”), which won the 2016 Lin Rong-san Literature Award for Best Modern Poem, is a typical example of rap-like poetry.
Bing Bu / Xiao Yihui
Do you know that the way to leave a whirlpool is to stay still?
Just like the way to leave today
It is night again
I don’t know where I am. Clearly it is not the sea
Yet there are so many waves. Clearly it is not yesterday, yet
Nothing is different. Are you asleep
Do you know that besides tomorrow
Where else can we go?
Are you asleep? Pull open the curtains
See the lights coming from someone else’s windows
Those shadows that do not belong to us
All belong to a better form. It is night again
How afraid I am that you will dream of a better us
And then wake up
Afraid you will be saddened because of a better us
Like a map
That makes lost people sad in the same way
Do you know that the way to end being lost is to stay still?
Just like staying in yesterday. Clearly it is not the sea
Someone has permanently docked the ship in today’s room
Someone does not
In the first stanza, words and phrases like “leave,” “know,” “way,” and “clearly not” are repeatedly used; in the second stanza, “It is night again,” “better us” are repeated; in the third stanza, the same patterns as the first stanza recur, with only a few phrases changed. If we mark all syntactic loops and repeated vocabulary with “口口” (placeholder for repetition), the poem’s meaning is actually very thin and meager:
Bing Bu / Xiao Yihui (Annotated for Repetition)
Do you 口口口口 whirlpool’s 口口 is 口口口?
Just like 口口 today’s way
口口口口
I don’t 口口 where I am. 口口口口口
Yet there are so many waves. 口口 not yesterday, yet
Nothing is different. 口口口口
Do you know 口口 besides tomorrow
Where else can we go?
口口口口. Pull open the curtains
See the lights coming from someone else’s windows
Those shadows that do not 口口 belong to us
All 口口 belong to a better form. 口口口口
How afraid I am that you will dream of this us
And then wake up
Afraid you will be saddened because of this us
Like a map
That makes lost people sad in the same way
Do you 口口 end being lost 口口 is 口口口?
Just like staying in yesterday 口口. 口口口口口
口口 docked the ship permanently in today’s room
口口 does not
The poem’s over-inflation is very evident. That it could pass three selection stages and stand out shocked many readers. One can only say that the judges, in terms of “aesthetic perspective,” are indeed different from the general readership. They might need a thorough ophthalmologic examination to check for retinal diseases or lens detachment.
Section Five: Language Errors and Barriers in Modern Poetry
Language is a complex combination of several rule systems. Bloom and Lahey (1978) pointed out that language is formed at the intersection of form, content, and use. Form includes syntax, morphology, and phonology—elements connecting speech sounds to symbols; content refers to semantics; and use refers to pragmatics.
From the author’s perspective, “language-error sentences” (語病句) are analyzed from the syntactic level—that is, “Syntactic Structures”—to examine sentences and vocabulary, whereas “language-barrier sentences” (語障句) are analyzed from the semantic level—that is, “Conceptual Structures”—to investigate sentences and vocabulary.
I. Understanding “Language Errors”
(1) What is a “Language Error”
A language-error sentence is a sentence that does not conform to grammatical norms. Common types of language-error sentences include:
(1) Improper Word Order
Word order refers to the arrangement of sentence constituents within a sentence. The positions of these constituents are relatively fixed, and deviating from their natural positions may result in improper word order.
- Constituent Sequence Reversed
Incorrect: The children sleeping on neatly arranged beds also stopped speaking.
Correct: The children neatly sleeping on beds also stopped speaking. - Correspondence Confused
Incorrect: The document provided detailed regulations and profound explanations on issues in the economic field from both theoretical and policy perspectives.
Correct: The document provided detailed regulations and profound explanations on issues in the economic field from both policy and theoretical perspectives. - Misplacement of Conjunctions
Incorrect: If he cannot treat people humbly, the friends around him will gradually decrease.
Correct: If he cannot treat people humbly, the friends around him will gradually decrease.
(2) Improper Collocation
The relationship between sentence constituents is essentially a semantic collocation relationship. Semantic collocation primarily involves logical and customary language issues. Collocation that is logically reasonable and consistent with language habits is correct; otherwise, it is improper.
- Improper Subject-Predicate Collocation
Incorrect: The father’s illness never improved, yet he continued to work hard for a living.
Correct: The father’s illness never improved, yet he continued to toil for a living. - Improper Verb-Object Collocation
Incorrect: The old man grinned, pretending to smile.
Correct: The old man bared his teeth, pretending to smile. - Improper Modifier-Head Collocation
Incorrect: Many students in school uniforms and elderly people queued there to grab items.
Correct: Many elderly people and students in school uniforms queued there to grab items. - Improper Coordination of Items
Incorrect: Oranges, apples, carrots, and other fruits are rich in vitamins.
Correct: Oranges, apples, and carrots are rich in vitamins. - Improper Pairing of “one side / both sides”
Incorrect: Whether integrity can be maintained is the key for the government to gain public trust.
Correct: Maintaining integrity is the key for the government to gain public trust. - Improper Collocation of Conjunctive Words
Incorrect: Since it happened more than ten years ago, I still remember vividly.
Correct: Although it happened more than ten years ago, I still remember vividly.
- (3) Structural Confusion
Chinese syntax has a relatively independent systematic structure that should not be blurred; otherwise, structural confusion is easily caused. Common types of structural confusion include: mixed sentence patterns and improper order of clauses. - 1. Mixed Sentence Patterns
Incorrect: Lin Meiling’s scores in each subject all exceeded 90 points.
Correct: Lin Meiling’s scores in each subject all exceeded 90. - 2. Improper Order of Clauses
Incorrect: Jiahao fell onto the grass, hit by the fist of a tall boy.
Correct: Jiahao was hit by the fist of a tall boy and fell onto the grass. - (4) Improper Word Usage or Misuse of Word Class
Words are the foundation of language. If one does not understand a word’s part of speech, usage, or meaning, syntactic errors will result. Common types of improper word usage include: - 1. Confusion of Word Classes
Incorrect: Regarding the problems we face, I must seriously “think” about them.
Correct: Regarding the problems we face, I must seriously “consider” them. - 2. Unclear Word Meaning
Incorrect: My brother and I share a bed; we brothers often have different dreams while sharing the bed.
Correct: My brother and I share a bed; we brothers often dream different dreams. - 3. Made-up Words
Incorrect: A row of “human prints” remained on the beach, but was washed away by the incoming waves.
Correct: A row of footprints remained on the beach, but was washed away by the incoming waves. - 4. Improper Connotation or Tone
Incorrect: I have been deeply resentful about this matter, feeling profound guilt toward my cousin.
Correct: I have been unable to forget this matter, feeling profound guilt toward my cousin. - 5. Mixing Degrees of Severity
Incorrect: Mom stopped me from going outside to play.
Correct: Mom did not allow me to go outside to play. - 6. Misuse of Word Class
This includes improper use of “conversion between word classes” and misuse of rhetorical words of wrong word class (adjectives vs. adverbs). Consider the following poem as an example: - “The Fire Eater” / Xu Zhewei
- That person, a broken tree that has stopped growing
The regrowth of annual rings, forgetting to ask from the earth
Soul, devouring the fiery body
A gray bird, flies into
A bone porcelain jar of tiny space
Meditates on whether the distant world has the boundary of life and death
Chimney tilts upward, a long abrupt elephant trunk
Harvests sweet fruits from the human jungle
Observing people bowing, dressed in black
When finished, like a black pearl necklace
Broken threads fall like rain, scattering everywhere
The most unfamiliar journey, as clear as light
Opens mouth to eat fire, the body in chrysalis
The butterfly breaking the cocoon is all falling memories
A wisp of ascending white smoke, a handful
Of eternally sharp blades that split the mortal world
Sorrow and splendor like the separation of bone and flesh
Inside the furnace door, burns millions of lotus relics
Yet cannot burn a single one belonging to oneself
Fire Eater, ignites to survive
Cold icy earth yet warm hands see off
After a hundred generations, flowers bloom or it rains
The game of time’s magic cube
I, managing the present, looking at the sunlit forest of tombstones
A bell rings for returning home from work
Resonates slowly to awaken……
The dawn comes at its scheduled time - [Chen Qufei’s Analysis]
The title of The Fire Eater is unusual. From the poem’s narrative context, the author seems to attempt, through the perspective of a crematorium worker, to convey certain ideas using the crematorium and cremation scene. However, the main imagery of “The Fire Eater”—does it refer to the person being cremated in the first and third stanzas, or the crematorium worker “I” igniting for survival in the last stanza? The author seems not to clarify this, resulting in semantic confusion while reading. In other words, the story roles appear mixed and the narrative unclear, which is the main reason the poem is difficult to interpret. - From the first stanza, one can infer that “that person” is the deceased being cremated: “A gray bird flies into / A bone porcelain jar of tiny space / Meditates on whether the distant world has the boundary of life and death.” However, imagining the deceased as a broken tree, then extending to annual rings, seems disconnected and redundant, causing semantic barriers (language obstacle).
- The second stanza describes the exterior of the crematorium and relatives holding a farewell ceremony. The line: “Observing people bowing, dressed in black / When finished, like a black pearl necklace / Broken threads fall like rain, scattering everywhere,” compares the black-clad observers to a black pearl necklace broken into scattered beads. This analogy lacks similarity. If replaced with “crows,” the image becomes more reasonable and vivid. Perhaps the author intended: the deceased is like the string of black pearls; when the string breaks, the observers scatter like raindrops. While there is a loose visual similarity between black pearls and raindrops, their physical nature differs clearly.
- The third stanza depicts the process of cremation, but the imagery jumps too quickly, causing both language errors and obstacles. First, describing the cremated body as a “butterfly breaking the cocoon” is problematic. The deceased’s body turning into “a wisp of ascending white smoke” represents liberation of the form, which is not related to the metamorphosis of a butterfly; the connection is far-fetched, causing a semantic obstacle.
- Second, “eternally sharp blades that split the mortal world / Sorrow and splendor like the separation of bone and flesh” contains contradictory and difficult-to-understand meaning. The first line is semantically unclear; the second line compares abstract funeral emotions and concrete arrangements to “bone and flesh separation,” which is grammatically awkward and semantically confusing. Even from the perspective of the deceased’s relatives, it would be more reasonable to express it as “thus separated from the living forever.”
- The line “Inside the furnace door, burns millions of lotus relics / Yet cannot burn a single one belonging to oneself” contains philosophical thought, with “contradictory syntax.” Semantically, the first clause is affirmative, the second clause negates the first, suggesting that the cremated deceased is an ordinary person who never attained spiritual cultivation.
- The last stanza also has multiple problems: “Fire Eater, ignites to survive / Cold icy earth yet warm hands see off.” “Cold icy earth” implies the afterlife, but the following line: “After a hundred generations, flowers bloom or it rains / The game of time’s magic cube,” lacks sufficient clues. Readers cannot know what “flowers bloom or it rains / time magic cube” has to do with the cremated deceased’s world.
- Finally, “I, managing the present, looking at the sunlit forest of tombstones / A bell rings for returning home from work / Resonates slowly to awaken…… / The dawn comes at its scheduled time,” the phrase “managing the present” could be deleted, as it is an unnecessary grammatical insertion.
- This poem has many semantic and syntactic issues. Many sentences are awkward to read and very difficult to understand. Its expressive techniques have room for improvement. That it could stand out may be because judges, influenced by “theme first,” assumed the topic of cremated deceased would yield interesting passages. However, after analysis, no remarkable lines or thought-provoking imagery are found.
- This is a major problem in this poetry competition. Many works are mediocre, making it difficult to select pieces that meet readers’ expectations. This reflects that online poetry varies greatly in quality and generally has low poetic standard. Therefore, more effort is needed to cultivate online modern poetry and conduct critical analysis, guiding beginners to gradually overcome language errors and obstacles, and grow steadily in skill.
8.
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29.
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42.
II. Understanding “Language Obstacles”
(1) What is a “Language Obstacle”
Here, “language obstacle” refers to the situation where, due to missing elements in a sentence, incomplete or redundant components, or unclear expression, the reader finds it difficult to understand the speaker’s or author’s true meaning. Common types of sentences with language obstacles include the following:
(1) Missing Components
Different sentence types contain different sentence components. If any part is omitted, or if parts that should not be omitted are omitted, a missing component occurs, creating a language problem. Types of missing components include:
1. Missing Subject
Incorrect: All who do not cherish time are wrong.
Correct: All actions that do not cherish time are wrong.
2. Missing Predicate
Incorrect: The osmanthus in the campus has bloomed, that heart-soothing fragrance every corner.
Correct: The osmanthus in the campus has bloomed, that heart-soothing fragrance spreads to every corner.
3. Missing Object
Incorrect: Three Hundred Tang Poems is my favorite.
Correct: Three Hundred Tang Poems is my favorite book.
4. Incomplete Modifier
Incorrect: He stood and sat, sat and stood, tossing and turning until dawn.
Correct: He stood up and then sat down, sat down and then stood up, tossing and turning until dawn.
(2) Redundant Components
In Chinese, each sentence component has its own function. Components should not be incomplete nor added arbitrarily; otherwise, it easily creates language errors. Common types of redundant components include:
1. Repeated Words
Incorrect: Driving there, it takes fifteen minutes.
Correct: Driving there, it takes fifteen minutes.
2. Repetition of Meaning
Incorrect: I sat by the seaside all alone.
Correct: I sat by the seaside alone.
3. Arbitrary Piling of Words
Incorrect: His foundation in English is very poor, his base is very weak.
Correct: His foundation in English is very poor.
4. Mixing Redundant Statements
Incorrect: As a student, I am already a student in the second year of high school.
Correct: I am already a second-year high school student.
(3) Unclear Expression
Language-obstacle sentences also often appear as unclear expression, easily causing ambiguity or misunderstanding. Common types include:
1. Unclear Reference
Incorrect: Dad loved swimming when he was young, and he wouldn’t stop himself from swimming.
Correct: Dad loved swimming when he was young, and he wouldn’t stop Uncle from swimming.
2. Ambiguity
Incorrect: These things are too hard to carry; I put you in the bag.
Correct: These things are too hard to carry; I helped you pack the things in the bag.
3. Contradiction
Incorrect: The gentle spring breeze is blowing fiercely.
Correct: The gentle spring breeze is blowing softly.
(4) Errors in Modifiers Within Sentences
In Chinese sentences, the most common “language obstacle” (semantic error) often comes from the modifiers in the sentence. Modifiers are mainly adjectives (adj) and adverbs (adv), with the following word order:
[1] Adjectives: Words that directly or indirectly modify nouns or pronouns.
Adjective adj + 的 + Noun n
- He saw a beautiful girl. (beautiful)
- That chubby student is very clever. (chubby, clever)
- Today’s homework is both much and difficult. (much, difficult)
- I love delicious beef noodles. (delicious)
[2] Adverbs: Words that modify verbs, adjectives, or other adverbs. (Adverbs can indicate time, place, frequency, degree, situation, affirmation, negation, etc. 的 → 地.)
- Adverb adv + 地 + Verb v → The skater moved quickly on the rink.
- Adverb adv + Adjective adj + 的 + Noun n → I love super delicious beef noodles.
Common errors with modifiers include: [1] Wrong order and [2] Grammatical or word-class errors.
[1] Wrong Order: Misplacement of modifiers in a sentence can cause logical or semantic errors.
Examples:
- I love delicious super beef noodles. → semantic error
- The skater moved quickly on the rink. → semantically confusing
[2] Grammatical Errors in Modifiers: When the modifier itself has grammatical errors or misused word-class conversion, the sentence’s meaning becomes unclear.
Examples:
- Regarding the problems we face, I must seriously “think” about them. → wrong word class
- Quickly the skater moved on the rink. → semantically confusing
- Street lights, guarding the night warriors / topple one exhausted / shadows crawl home, warm skin faded → word-class conversion error
(5) Broken Contextual Semantic Chain
A broken chain in the signifying chain often occurs between sentences in context, or due to inappropriate image jumps, causing a break in semantic logic. It may also occur when the causal relationship is not fully understood, resulting in semantic misfires or incomprehensibility.
Let us examine the following poem review by the author:
“The Dream of Drilling Wood” / Lin Xu-jie
The dream vanishes in the instant of flame.
We all panic as we search for another
piece of wood to drill.
That is a painting that is not allowed to be destroyed.
Thus we knock on passersby who have not yet been understood.
A sentence of rain from the sky drenched
the misery seen by the eyes.
No color can dodge the intrusion of black and white.
Only the clouds are gray, safely
in the corner watching a coin tossed into a beggar’s broken bowl.
We, madly drilling wood,
have long had faces dark with immaturity.
In the tangled net where red flowers fall in June,
a moose runs into the stone forest, attempting
to play the soaring eagle, while the flame is the beginning of the dream,
easily igniting and just as easily extinguishing.
Those on the high tower who can hear dreams at any time
are a species carrying the world with a smile.
Is that noble,
or is it seeing through the rugged cliffs beneath the mask?
Thus, it does not matter whether the coins in the bowl
fall one by one through the holes.
Are those
dreams of drilling wood dreams waiting to be abandoned?
In spring, deceiving oneself is a popular behavior.
And the sea surface and seabed are opposite words.
Under many eyes, one is forced to feign calm,
yet the hands drilling wood continue moving,
but only quietly and silently
before the flames appear.
[Chen Qu-fei’s Analysis]
This poem is not only intriguing in its title, but the imagery throughout—circling among “wood” → “flame” → “dream”—is equally captivating. Naturally, during reading, one encounters many obstacles to comprehension. These obstacles arise from long sentences and complex free associations. The author seems to employ a leap-style “automatic language” to handle the imagery generated through horizontal thinking (free association), deliberately ignoring logical chains between sentences. This results in several semantic “broken chains,” causing frequent “semantic barriers” during reading.
We all panic as we search for another / piece of wood to drill / That is a painting that is not allowed to be destroyed.
The metaphorical relationship between wood and painting does not work, because there is no apparent similarity; it can only be regarded as an “out-of-the-blue” free association.
Thus we knock on passersby who have not yet been understood / a sentence of rain from the sky drenched / the misery seen by the eyes.
Passersby are not objects like bells or drums; how are they being knocked? And by what exactly? There is no semantic clue here. Using “a sentence” as a unit for “rain from the sky” is clearly inaccurate; it should be “a shower” or “a spell.”
“No color can dodge the intrusion of black and white / only the clouds are gray, safely / in the corner watching a coin tossed into a beggar’s broken bowl.”
This passage uses personification for the clouds and is semantically understandable.
“We, madly drilling wood / have long had faces dark with immaturity.”
In the second sentence, the author deliberately converts the adjective “dark” into a verb, making the syntax awkward. The normal phrasing should be: “faces of immaturity have long turned dark,” though even then, the meaning remains somewhat unnatural.
“In the tangled net where red flowers fall in June / … will they fall one by one through the holes.”
This description, from the moose to the eagle, can be seen as a “transformed imagination.” Then the author pulls the visual back to “flame” and “dream,” and immediately introduces “those on the high tower.” However, the reader again hits a “wall”: “or is it seeing through the rugged cliffs beneath the mask”. If the author intends to portray the cold face beneath the mask, using “rugged cliffs” as imagery is actually odd and inappropriate.
“Thus, it does not matter whether the coins in the bowl / fall one by one through the holes.”
This minor conclusion is also inexplicably arbitrary, lacking logical causality.
The final paragraph:
“Are those dreams of drilling wood dreams waiting to be abandoned? / In spring, deceiving oneself is a popular behavior.”
These two long sentences are semantically coherent. But the following:
“And the sea surface and seabed are opposite words / Under many eyes, one is forced to feign calm”
becomes obscure again. “Many eyes” could barely be understood as the eyes of sea creatures, but what exactly is emphasized by “opposite words”?
“Yet the hands drilling wood continue moving / but only quietly and silently before the flames appear.”
The ending introduces a strange oxymoron. If “the hands continue moving,” how can they be “quiet and silent before the flames appear”? Perhaps the author intends to express the breathless anticipation of “us” before the wood catches fire.
This poem attracts the author’s interest because of its surrealistic “automatic language” appearance. However, the use of automatic language in modern poetry, due to deliberately breaking logical connections between imagery and imagery, inevitably produces numerous language errors and semantic barriers, hindering comprehension during reading. Occasionally attempting this may be harmless, but it is not a viable writing strategy.
Through this analysis, the reader is introduced to “automatic language,” which is why this poem was selected—not because its expressive technique is particularly strong, but because it is indeed “very special.”
3. Sentence Revision
Identify sentences that contain grammatical errors or semantic issues, and attempt to revise the following problematic sentences:
Original Sentence – Corrected Sentence
- More than 200,000 people died in this earthquake.
The verb “die” is intransitive and cannot take a direct object. Change to: “More than 200,000 people died in this earthquake.” - Recently, he finalized a draft of a long novel.
The verb “finalize a draft” is intransitive and cannot take a direct object. Change to: “Recently, he finalized a draft of a long novel.” - In his creative work, he is particularly skilled at using small props.
The verb “be skilled at” cannot take a nominal object. Change to: “He is particularly skilled at using small props in his creative work.” - Because they neglect fire prevention and the fire equipment is very old, greater danger is concealed.
The adjective “potential” cannot take a direct object. Replace “potential” with “concealed/hidden.” - Tourists who come to visit all praise this place as a paradise on earth.
The noun “favorable title” cannot take a direct object. Replace it with “praise.” - They sent these fossils to the relevant department and asked experts to appraise the scientific value of the fossils.
Remove the word “conduct.” - Hurry up and tidy the house; the guests are about to arrive.
Remove the word “a little/briefly.” - Sorry, I really can’t help you.
Change “cannot help you” to “cannot help your needs.” - Polar bears also have the habit of seasonal migration. In spring, they drift north; people have encountered them on ice floes 1,000 kilometers from the mainland, or even further north. In autumn, they return to lower latitudes to be active.
Change “encountered” from “met” to “came across.”
Notes
- Source: Dongcheng Jushi, Notes on People Living Here
http://blog.xuite.net/wdc6043/wretch/149349832-%E7%AD%94K%E5%95%8F%E8%BF%B4%E8%A1%8C
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