My student came crying for her suffering from witnessing the pain of her dying father. I know how biting her wounded soul is. Her tears illustrates how lonely, depressed, hopeless, and frustrated she is. Her ill father, alcoholic grandparents, and traumatic mother could not offer her any strength and intimate relationship she would need to grow into a secure young girl now. How could I comfort and help her to overcome her inherited disaster and become a totally happy and secure girl.
After crying with her for a while…….
I share my own story with her.
I was in the same situation with you when I was a little girl, too.
The insecure and wounded little Anne without any support around but only the legacy of her strong mind grow up from gifts in disguise. The numerous disasters in her life are just like Knifes which need to be availed wisely. If you hold the disaster ( knife ) on the cutting edge of the knife, you would get hurt badly but if you hold it firmly on the shaft, you could use it as a great tool to cut off any lies, ugly, illness, and negative in your life.
I encourage her to get strength from the real and internal power of the spirit: the legacy of her mind.
Don’t feel unbalanced and jealous for what you don’t have. People who are occupied or blinded by the false and transient legacy of material, fame, titles, and advantage would tend to forget or belittle the pursuit of the legacy of their mind.
What’s the legacy of mind? She asked
I told her that they are:
To love: love unconditionally and spiritually without worrying about rejection, doubting and expecting.
To give: give without asking back. Give away what you want and then you will get what you want.
To lament: lament for the weak of yourself and others for no one is perfect and strong all the time and that’s why we need each other. We all are just one-wing angles who need one another to be the real angles.
To take: take the trail, responsibility, failure, criticism, and suffering for they are just real presents to enhance your growth.
To enjoy: enjoy the present moment when you are remembering the past and hope for the future. What’s eternal and truth is now (present moment) , so open your mind to really feel the moment even it’s not joyful.
To explore: explore for what you want with your true self. And at the end of your life, you will find that the real happiness and success.
To celebrate: celebrate every time for what you spend time on and what you make efforts for. And at the end of your life, you will not fear the death of your body for your soul wouldn’t die but be celebrated by the people around you who inherit and experience the legacy of your mind.
I told her how lucky she is for she knows how to love, give, lament, take, enjoy, explore, and celebrate at such young age.
And I encourage her that she is a strong, rich, confident, joyful, and successful young girl who has chance to cultivate her legacy of her mind.
And then we smile..
It’s smile with real joy, love and peace.
I know she is ready now to use her legacy of mind to face what’s going on.
I end our conversation by reminding her again that what’s real matter or holding us back is not what is on front of or in back of us but what’s within us: what’s on our mind.