也許留些鬍子看起來會更具成熟穩重吧

只是紅拂女會選她當夫君我想應該事前世因緣注定的

Top five advices you would have given to the Curly Beard had he had another shot at the lady in red:

5. It’s your manner – No sane woman would seriously consider a guy leaning on the couch like a potato, rubbing his belly while complaining that he’s hungry.

4. It’s your untraceable wealth – Makes them wonder if you’re running a drug cartel, or worse even, a chain porn shop.

3. It’s your car  – Dude, WTF? Dump the donkey and get a horse!

2. It’s your diet – Personally slicing up then serving a plate of human flesh as beer foods provides them reasonable doubts about their long term futures with you, especially during the lean years.

And the No. 1 advice I would have given to the curly beard guy is...

...It’s your beard – watching them lice crawling in and out of those ill-maintained curly beard doesn’t really turn a chick on.

The Rage of the Kitchen Lady -

Sweats and bloods toiled, day and night up,
All  that I could hear, clamors of these once shining pots.
How many meals cooked, I wouldn't count but remember well,
Mixing thousands of herbs and spices, a lousy worn-out spoon I used.

In the middle of the heat, some bearded scoundrel showed up,
What was he to have, for foods and for drink and what's not?
Making a scene he did, drunk and rude like hell,
But dare he ask me, where're his meal and Mao-Niao?

I slapped his right with a saucepan, I punched his left with a soup pot,
Sending his arse rolling, I made sure he regretted for having the guts.
Massing with me and thinking it could be so swell?
You bearded M*******cker, for dessert, a pair of fists for you!

READ: We reserve the rights of NOT to serve!