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【書摘】在斯萬家那邊—希爾貝特 (Gilberte) 7
2014/07/06 07:14:04瀏覽248|回應0|推薦9
【書摘】在斯萬家那邊希爾貝特 (Gilberte) 7
Mais à l’époque où j’aimais Gilberte, je croyais encore que l’Amour existait réellement en dehors de nous ; que, en permettant tout au plus que nous écartions les obstacles, il offrait ses bonheurs dans un ordre auquel on n’était pas libre de rien changer ; il me semblait que si j’avais, de mon chef, substitué à la douceur de l’aveu la simulation de l’indifférence, je ne me serais pas seulement privé d’une des joies dont j’avais le plus rêvé, mais que je me serais fabriqué à ma guise un amour factice et sans valeur, sans communication avec le vrai, dont j’aurais renoncé à suivre les chemins mystérieux et préexistants.

(Éditions Gallimard, 1987)

當我愛希爾貝特那時節,我還以為愛情當真在我們身外客觀實際地存在著;以為只要讓我們盡量排除障礙,愛情就會在我們無力作任何變動的範圍內為我們提供幸福;我彷彿覺得,如果我自覺自願地用假裝的不動感情來代替承認愛情這種甘美,我就不僅會剝奪自己最最夢寐以求的那份歡愉,也可以以我自己的自由意志,製造一份虛假的、沒有價值的、與現實毫無關係的愛情,而我就會拒絕沿著他那條神秘的、命中註定的道路前進。
(p.433~434 追憶似水年華 I 在斯萬家那邊 聯經版 1992)

可是在我愛著吉爾貝特的那個時候,我還以為愛情真的存在於我們自身之外,以為至多只要我們去排除那些障礙,愛情就會按照一種由不得我們去作任何改變的順序,把它的幸福逐一地給予我們;我似乎覺得,倘若我有意用假裝的冷漠取代充滿柔情的表白,我不僅要失去一種夢寐以求的快樂,而且還會很輕率地為自己炮製一種矯揉造作、毫無價值的愛情,它跟真正的愛情是無緣的,這條神秘的、早就存在著的路,我可不願意去走。
(p.445
追尋逝去的時光 I 去斯萬家那邊 上海譯文版 周克希譯 2004)

But at the period when I was in love with Gilberte, I still believed that Love did really exist, apart from ourselves; that, allowing us, at the most, to surmount the obstacles in our way, it offered us its blessings in an order in which we were not free to make the least alteration; it seemed to me that if I had, on my own initiative, substituted for the sweetness of a confession a pretence of indifference, I should not only have been depriving myself of one of the joys of which I had most often dreamed, I should have been fabricating, of my own free will, a love that was artificial and without value, that bore no relation to the truth, whose mysterious and foreordained ways I should thus have been declining to follow.
(Translated by C. K. Scott Moncrieff )

But during the period when I loved Gilberte, I still believed that Love really existed outside of us; that, allowing us at the very most to remove obstacles in our way, it offered its joys in an order which we were not free to alter; it seemed to me that if I had, on my own initiative, substituted for the sweetness of confession the simulation of indifference, I would not only have deprived myself of one of the joys of which I had dreamed most often but that I would have fabricated for myself in my own way a love that was artificial and without value, without any connection to the real one, whose mysterious and preexisting paths I would have had to forgo following.
(Translated by Lydia Davis)



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