Mom , You have me ! - 恰恰在多倫多

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Mom , You have me !

2005/10/19 06:27:43瀏覽2918｜回應15｜推薦62

Mom , You have me
.............................................

I just finished reading your essay....
I didn't understand everything you wrote
cause my Chinese is not that good,
but I think I understood most of it.

剛剛讀完你的那篇"情願孤獨" ,
我的中文不是那麼好, 所以不能完全明白你所寫的.
但是大部分我都了解.

I realized just how much you and I are alike...
I don't like telling people my deepest feelings
and thoughts either, I find it hard to open myself up.

發現自己跟你是多麼相像 ,
不喜歡告訴人們內心深處的感覺和想法.
我很難將自己放開.

I have one person right now,
to this day that I can call a "true" friend
(other than you , of course) and that is Flora.

到目前為止, 我只有一個稱得上是真正的朋友,
(當然除了你以外) 那就是Flora.

There are things even you and her do not know...
I don't make friends very easily.
I've been told by many people who just met me say that
their first impression of me is "snob".
Why? I do not know.

有些事, 旣使是你或她都不曉得.
我很難結交朋友, 一些剛剛見面的人告訴我,
他們對我的第一個印象是高傲. 爲什麼? 我不知道.

There are many occasions where I cannot add
to conversations cause I cannot relate.
Sometimes it's about brand name clothes,
which I do not care for also,

有一些場合, 我無法加入話題, 因為跟那些沒有關係.
好像說名牌服飾, 我一點都不在意.

sometimes it's about how awful their sister/ brother
was to them which I have neither,
or how their dad has a new girlfriend
because their parents are divorced,

有時是談論, 關於他們可怕的兄弟姐妹, 可是我也沒有.
或者說, 他們的爸爸有了新女友, 因為父母離婚了.

or which fancy restaurant they went to eat
at the other day where one dish was $60,
many topics I find I can't contribute to.

或者說有一天 , 他們去過那家高級餐廳, 一道菜就要六十塊.
很多的話題, 我真的無法投入.

I find myself kind-of stuck in the middle...
white kids lifestyle I cannot relate to
cause I was not brought up in a fully American household,
Chinese kids think I am too "Americanized"
and I cannot relate to them either.

我發現自己好像被卡在中間; 動彈不得.
跟白人孩子的生活方式沒有相連 , 因為我不是在美式家庭長大.
中國孩子覺得我太洋化, 所以我跟他們都無法溝通.

Then there are kids who are like me who
came to Canada very young or was born here...
but I can't seem to relate to them either.
I guess I've always been different
and people see that so they keep their distance.

然而那些跟我一樣,
在很小的時候就來到加拿大, 或是在這兒出生.
唉! 我也一樣跟他們有隔閡.
我猜人們也看到我的不同 , 所以和我保持距離.

I have this wall up too, I've built a very high wall,
even since junior high that wall has never come down
maybe because when I was little kids were so mean to me.

我也讓這道牆越築越高, 旣使讀中學時, 這道牆也沒倒塌過 .
也許因為當我是小孩子時, 曾被傷害過.

I grew up fine, a little "reserved" and constantly cautious
but overall I think I've become a strong young woman.
Most of my "friends" in Montreal have never seen me cry
or even angry, cause I fake a smile
even when something is bothering me.

長大後, 我變得有點沉默和經常小心謹慎.
但大致上我算是一個堅強的年輕女性.
大多數的朋友從沒見過我哭泣 ˋ生氣 ,
旣使當時被一些事困擾著, 我都會用微笑掩飾.

I don't let them see any of weaknesses.
I put on a strong face...
but sometimes pretending to be strong becomes so tiring.

不想讓他們看到我的軟弱 , 我戴上堅強的面具.
但是有時假裝堅強 ; 卻讓我覺得很疲倦.

I understand you mom...
I find it hard to trust people, and it seems when I do...
90% of those end up disappointing me.

我了解你, 媽媽.
我知道很難去信任別人, 因為我曾這麼作過,
但是有百分之九十的人, 最後都讓我失望了.

I'm not sure if I completely understood your essay
but I think I got an overall idea of what you were saying.
I love you mom and you're MY best friend, you have me :)

不確定完全明白你的文章, 但是大致上, 我都知道你想說什麼.
我愛你! 媽媽, 你是我最好的朋友.
你有我 , 你永遠都不是孤獨的.

恰恰的女兒 Fiona 2005.10.12

( 心情隨筆｜家庭親子 )

引用網址：https://classic-blog.udn.com/article/trackback.jsp?uid=chacha29&aid=79365


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	風城行者等級：8 留言｜加入好友

and so many admirers
	2005/11/12 13:05
Essay not only you read , but also include the one who is the essay's admirer . 風城行者留


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nice article
	2005/10/27 03:57
My daughter is born in USA. She always tells me that I am her best friend in Chinese and English, even though she is only 5. I always wonder what she will be when she grows up. Maybe one day she doesn't know Chinese any more. I hope she can still understand me and treat me as her best friend, just like your daughter. Thanks for sharing the lovely article.


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一早就讓人家掉眼淚～
	2005/10/20 10:01
看著看著，怎麼覺得好像我和我媽之間～～不過恰恰女比較孝順又賢慧，手又細緻美麗：）人家一邊吃麵包一邊掉眼淚，我同事還以為我吃到餿掉的過期麵包＠＠只要有心，到哪裡都不遠。


	阿菊等級：8 留言｜加入好友

恰恰
	2005/10/20 09:52
我女兒送給你會不會變得比較體貼？經常當孝順女兒的老媽～阿菊溫度在變化，你的心，也在變化嗎？


	123酷媽等級：8 留言｜加入好友

早就知道母女情深啦~
	2005/10/20 09:02
恰恰請告訴妳女兒她非常上相尤其她把頭髮打濕了拿著刀那張一付「你再來亂試試看」的架勢很好很好~ 不過她戴著蓬蓬頭假髮怎麼讓酷媽想起Julia小喵啊？喔！這裡不是談攝影是談女兒給媽媽的信酷媽還能說什麼呢當然將心比心感動啦！七月，一片金紅豔豔。


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謝謝三貓
	2005/10/20 06:00
在公司看到你的回應又高興又心酸想到她的童年我讓她受苦了雖然我一直努力把最好的都給她但是總有一些無奈她在蒙特婁獨自生活五年我花了很多錢但是看她成熟獨立我很安慰謝謝你讓我看到她的手修長典雅是藝術家的手有人稱讚過美麗的手


	ANY愛妮等級：8 留言｜加入好友

幸福
	2005/10/20 05:56
看文章聽背景音樂為什麼害我眼框氾紅 ? ANY 你可以延伸為 Anything, Anywhere, Anyone, Anybody, Anyway......


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Fiona 攝影作品展
	2005/10/20 05:55
我剛剛整理出一本相簿上次是萬聖節化妝照這次是她攝影課的作品用三角架自己攝影自己在暗房沖洗一手包辦主題是表現不同風格的自己共有八張我放兩星期就會刪除趕快去看她今年二十五歲在溫哥華讀廣告設計


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so sweet
	2005/10/20 03:26
so sweet !!


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Fiona畫圖
	2005/10/20 01:27
這是前幾天她在畫圖的時候我幫她拍的 20幾年前二貓和Fiona曾在我家住過一陣子那時二貓出門去教書 Fiona就會哭到嘴巴成四角形的到現在印象還很深刻這一個多月來只有我和她在同一個屋簷下我迷上做動畫常常關了電腦就直接上床睡覺貼心的她總會幫我把電鍋插頭拔掉瓦斯爐上的湯鍋放進冰箱有其他一些拉拉雜雜的生活細節也都打點的很好ㄟ我很懷疑是同一個女孩嗎 ^____^ 還有.... 二貓我很累喔你貼了三個地方我也跟著回應三次 @__@


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